Logie's Big Time Crush!
by stefunnylovescarlos
Summary: When Logan falls in love with his best friend, a whole lot can change. This is jammmmm packed with drama! SLASH! Cargan. Kames. You have been warned.
1. You love who?

_ALEJANDRO! ALEJANDRO! ALE- ALE- JANDRO!_ Carlos sang as he sat on a chair listening to his iPod on full blast by the Palmwoods pool. People were starting to stare and give Carlos dirty looks. Logan quickly went over to Carlos and poked him."Dude shut up people are looking at you." Logan said.

Carlos pulled a headphone out of his ear and gave Logan an innocent look. "What'd you say buddy?"Logan melted when he saw that look. He loved everything about Carlos. He loved his beautiful brown eyes, his innocence, the fact that he didn't care what people thought of him, He loved his best friend.

"LOGAN!" Carlos yelled waving his hands in front of Logan's face. "What! Sorry I spaced out." Logan said. Carlos laughed, "Dude you're so weird!" "We should probably head back Carlitos, it's getting late." Logan said. "What are you, my mother?" Carlos said with a smile. Logan laughed "Yes! Now let's go!" "Alright Mom!" Carlos said.

They both walked into the lobby with Carlos in front of Logan. Logan's eyes went straight to Carlos' boootay. "Damn you got a nice ass!" Logan accidently blurted out. "Oh shit." He whispered. Carlos turned around, looked at him for a second and said "WHAT?" Logan's eyes bulged and he said. "Uh not you! Some girl walked by and uh bleep blop bloop...yeah" Carlos laughed. "Look at you Logan! Trying to be all smooth with the ladies!" "I am smooth!" Logan laughed nervously.

"Race you to the elevator!" Carlos yelled. "Noooo! Dude!" Logan laughed as Carlos put his helmet on and ran into the elevator.

Once they were in the elevator Carlos put one arm around Logan's shoulder and pulled him close to him. "Logannnnn" he Carlos whined, "When we get upstairs can you pleasseeeeeee make me something to eat?" He batted his eyelashes. Logan blushed deeply from the close contact and Carlos' adorable face. "Y-eahh sure Carlos." Was what he managed to say. "Yay! I love you man! You're the bestest friend ever!" Carlos said adjusting his helmet. "Ha, no problem bud." Logan gulped.

When they got to apt. 2J Kendall and James were playing dome hockey and James was obviously mad about something. "James what's wrong?" Carlos asked. Kendall answered for him. "If I win, James can't do his hair for a week!" Logan and Carlos busted up laughing and James glared at them. "You're just jealous that you don't have hair like this!" he said pointing to his beautiful locks of hair.

"Hey Kendall, I need to talk to you about something….you got a minute?" Logan asked. "Yeah sure bro, just let beat James real quick." Kendall said with a smirk. "Hey Kendall you will not wi-"James started to say as Kendall shot the winning goal. "I win" he said.

**Logan's POV**

I quickly walked into the room that Carlos and I shared. I needed to tell someone how I felt about Carlos. I couldn't tell James because by the next morning the whole Palmwoods would know, and I definitely wasn't ready to tell Carlos. Suddenly the door opened and Kendall walked in.

**Kendall's POV**

"Whatchoo need Loganaitor!" I said. He looked worried and this really concerned me. Logan was like a little brother to me even though I was younger. "Is something wrong?" I could even hear the worry in my voice.

**Logan's POV**

"It's me. I'm wrong!" I said. I was wrong, it wasn't right for me to be in love with a guy, especially my best friend. "What do you mean you're wrong Logan….wait did you fail a test!" Kendall said."Dude it's okay to fail sometimes it's—"Logan cut him off. "Kendall no I didn't fail a test!" "Then what's wrong!" Kendall asked. "I kinda…." I started but looked down and bit my lip. "Spit it out dude!" Kendall said putting his hands in the air in frustration. "I think I'm in love with Carlos. " Suddenly the door opened.

**Carlos POV**

I heard Logan yell from our room. "Dammit James I think there fighting should I check?" I asked. "YES! Go be nosy! I want to know what's happening!" James said. I was about to knock on the door and heard Logan say something about loving something. Then I yanked the door open. "Hey!" was all I could say. Logan's eyes were wide with fear and Kendall looked shocked. "What?" I asked, and then I laughed. Logan stuttered "D-i-i-d you hear anything?" "No, I just heard the word love." I said innocently." So who do you love?" Logan turned bright red.


	2. Logan has a secret

**Logan's POV**

I started to sweat. I tried to think of something to say but my mouth was dry. I looked at Kendall he looked like he saw a ghost. Eventually Kendall said something "Carlos, if he wanted you to know he would've told you, so just get the hell out of here." The minute Kendall said it I could tell that he had hurt Carlos' feelings. "Oh, alright I just thought we were best friends and we could tell each other anything" Carlos said to Logan as tears started to form in his eyes from Kendall's harsh words. He started to turn back and I said "Carlos wait!" I walked up to him. "What!" he said wiping a tear from his eye. "I'll tell you someday….just not now." I said putting my hand on his shoulder.

**Carlos' POV**

It seemed like Logan was staring into my soul I could feel his gorgeous brown eyes making my face turn red. Whoa! Wtf is my problem! Logan's my best friend! He's a guy! I'm not gay! "Alright Logan." That was all I could say as I walked out and stuck my tongue out at Kendall. I felt weird as I walked out of the room. I didn't know why I was having these feelings for Logan all of a sudden. Then James walked up to me and asked "What happened! Oh tell me tell me tell me!" "Nothing you nosy bitch!" I said and laughed at the face that James made. I went to sit on the couch and James kept giving me weird looks. "What queerbait!" I said to James.

**James' POV**

"Nothing faghole!" I said. Carlos smiled half heartedly. He seemed weird and it was bugging me. He would usually try to kick my ass for calling him that. "What's wrong Caaaarrlos!" I asked. "Dude I'm fine! Why do you think something's wrong! Do I look weird or something! Aye Chihuahua! I'm going to bed." He started walking to the room that Kendall and I shared. "Hey that's—"Carlos slammed the door. "—my room." I decided to ask Logan and Kendall if they knew why Carlos was so mad.

**Logan's POV**

"OMG Kendall! Why'd you have to be so mean to him!" I shouted. "Hey! I was just trying to cover up for you! Kendall said with a frown. "Yeah sorry I just can't stand to see him sad!" I sighed. "So…you're _in love _with Carlos?" Kendall smiled. "That's so cute!" I was so confused. "You think it's cute…I thought you would flip out!" I smiled then frowned. "I think I kinda hinted to him that I love him." "How?" Kendall scratched his head. "Cuz I said that I'd tell him someday and he gave me this funny look and blushed." I then thought I heard someone by the door.

**James POV**

I went to the door that was cracked open. I didn't just want to barge in because they could be talking about some juicy gossip and I didn't want them just stop when I came in. I put my ear close to the door and listened. "_So…you're in love with Carlos?_ _That's so cute! "You think it's cute…I thought you would flip out!"…." _"Oh my washboard abs he's a nancy boy!" I leaned in closer to the door when all of a sudden I fell and the door swung open as I landed in the room and screamed.

**Carlos POV**

I slammed the door and slid down it. I closed my eyes and tried to get Logan's handsome face out of my mind. How did this suddenly just happen? I had just fallen hard for Logan. I knew I had feelings for him but I always denied how strong they were. I sighed. I knew I felt something whenever he and I got close. I should probably just go to bed. I got up off the floor and went into bed. I heard a girl scream, it was probably James watching a scary movie.

**Narrators POV**

"WHAT THE EFF JAMES WERE YOU LISTENING!" Logan yelled, his hands balled up into fists. "Oh uh ha funny story—"James started to say. "I'll show you a funny story mother fu—"Kendall covered Logan's mouth. "What did you hear James?" Kendall asked calmly. "I heard that Logan is in love with Carlos." James said awkwardly. Logan moved Kendall's hand from his mouth. "If you tell anyone I'll ki—"Kendall covered his mouth again. "Let's make a deal James; if you keep your big mouth shut then you can have your hair products back!" Kendall smirked. James zipped his lips. "I won't even tell my reflection."

The next morning Carlos woke up in Kendall and James' room. He looked at the clock, it read: 5:07 am. _Logan's probably up. _Carlos thought. He jumped out of bed and went into the kitchen and sure enough Logan was up baking muffins. Carlos laughed "Why are you baking muffins at 5 in the morning?" He stretched and yawned.

**Carlos POV**

"They're for you." Logan said with his adorable crooked smile. I started choking midway through a yawn. Logan laughed"…you okay?" I stammered "Yeeeeah I'm alright….b-but why are you making them for _**me**_?" Logan rolled his eyes and giggled. "Because when we were in the elevator you asked if I could make you something to eat but I never got to it yesterday so now I'm making muffins!" "OHHH!" I said, a little too loud. Logan narrowed his eyes and laughed. "Why are you so awkward this morning?" "Uh I don't know maybe because I usually don't wake up this early." I ran my hands through my hair.

**Logan's POV**

_OH MY DAMN, CARLOS IS SEXY! _I thought to myself. Kendall told me to keep my cool around Carlos and it was kinda hard when all he was wearing were sweat pants. Carlos looked like he blushed as he went to sit on the couch. "_Did he see me check him out…oh shit."_ I opened the oven to get the muffins out. I grabbed the hot tray with my bare hands. "OW! OW!"

**Carlos POV**

I heard Logan scream and ran over to him. "Logie are you okay!" I was so worried. He had tears in his eyes and was waving his right hand in the air. "I grabbed the stupid tray without oven mitts!" I grabbed a bucket filled it with ice and water and stuck his hand in it. Then I got some gauze and cooling cream from my hockey bag. I took Logan's hand out of the water and put the cream all over it, and then I wrapped it up really good in gauze. I looked up at him and wiped his tears away. I held his injured hand in mine and asked "Are you okay Logie?" He smiled at me and blushed "You're the best friend ever Carlos, I love you."

**Narrators POV**

Carlos' brow furrowed and he opened his mouth to reply but he noticed that Kendall had walked in, in time to hear that.


	3. Overload of Emotions

**Narrator's POV**

Carlos got so surprised by Kendall that he tried to move away from Logan but ended up tripping right on top of him. Kendall laughed "What the hell is going on here? Did I interrupt something?" he continued to laugh. Carlos looked down at Logan who he was on top of. They both blushed and Carlos got up quickly and helped Logan up. "I- uh sorry I'm just so- uh sorry" Carlos stammered. "It's cool man." Logan said, his voice a little higher than usual.

Kendall smirked. "So, uh what were you guys doing?" "NOTHING!" Carlos blurted out. Logan laughed nervously "I made muffins and burned myself, and Carlos fixed my hand up." He held up his injured hand. "So now I see why you love him." Kendall said trying to hold back a laugh. Logan and Carlos both looked at Kendall. Carlos had a confused expression while Logan looked like he wanted to die. Both were red in the face. "What? I heard you tell Carlos that he's your best friend ever and that you love him." Kendall smirked. "I mean like-uh like friend love Kendork!" Logan said frustrated. "Hey! Don't call me that!" Kendall said still laughing. "I'm gonna go take a shower." Carlos said as he zipped out of the kitchen.

**Logan's POV**

Once Carlos was gone I slapped Kendall. "Ow! What was that for?" Kendall asked rubbing his cheek. "You scared the shit out of me!" I said putting my hands on my hips. I went over to pull the muffins out of the oven the proper way. I pulled a chunk off of one and put it in my mouth. "I think Carlos likes you too." Kendall said smiling. I started to choke on my muffin. "Why *cough* would you *cough* think that!" I said still choking. "Did you not see his face!" Kendall said putting his hands in the air. Suddenly James walked in stretching. "Whose face?" he asked yawning.

**Carlos POV**

I ran to the shower, I needed to clear my head. I locked the door, stripped and got in the shower. I thought about all the things that had just happened. Logan burning his hand, Kendall laughing at us, falling on top of Logan….but I mostly thought about Logan saying he loved me…. as a friend. I took in a deep breath and felt the knot in my throat. Then I just started crying…I was just so confused and it frustrated me. Someone knocked on the door so I tried to stop crying and yelled "What!" but my voice cracked. "Are you okay Carlos?" It was James. I finished showering and yelled "Yes James!" I dried myself then put a towel around my waist and walked into the room that Logan and I shared.

**Logan POV**

"James just mind ya business!" I said putting the muffins in a dish. "You already told me about Carlos, so might as well tell me!" James said smiling. "No, we didn't tell you! You're just nosy!" Kendall said laughing and hitting James on the back of the head. "HEY! Watch the hair!" James said laughing. "So what about Carlos' face?" James asked curiously. "I think he likes Logie." Kendall said with a proud smile. He told James everything that had just happened. "Aw! Sounds like love!" James said while eating a muffin. "Shut up!" I said blushing. "By the way I made those muffins for Carlos, so don't eat them all!" I started cleaning up the mess I made from baking muffins.

**James POV**

"Geeze sorry Logan!" I said while pulling out my lucky comb. "Damn I need to take a shower, Carlos needs to hurry up!" I said walking toward the bathroom. I was about to bang on the door and yell at him but when I got close to the door it sounded like he was crying. So I just gently knocked and asked if he was okay. He sounded annoyed and I didn't wanna bug him so I just waited.

**Logan POV**

After I was finished cleaning I went into my room. I went and sat on the bed. The door to the bathroom opened and Carlos came into the room with only a towel around his waist. He was gorgeous. His black hair was all messy and wet and he had smooth ripped abs. My mouth went dry when I saw him. I tried to say something but the only thing that came out was "Hi." He half-smiled and laughed "Hi Logan!" he said. "_Damn he has a sexy voice."_ I thought. There was a silence. Then Carlos dropped his towel and…he was wearing boxers. My face scrunched up. Disappointed. "What do I look fat in this?" Carlos asked laughing. "NO!" I laughed. "I was just thinking about something..." "_Your bootayy!" _said my thoughts.

**Carlos POV**

When I got in the room Logan was staring me down. I felt self-conscious. Maybe I should stop eating twinkies. But I love twinkies. Damn. Then Logan said hi to me which was awkward. I continued to get dressed and I could've sworn I saw Logan stare at my ass. But he just said he was thinking. When I was fully dressed I looked at Logan and asked "How's your hand?" "So much better because of you." Was what he said. My mouth fell open and I didn't know what to say. So I just nervously said "Anything for a friend." Then he winked at me. I turned red. Like really red. I cleared my throat and said "Well, Imma go try one of those muffins you made." I grabbed my helmet and dashed out of the room. Kendall looked at me funny and said "Dude chill, what's wrong?" I shoved a muffin in my mouth and said "Nothing, I'm fine!" then I smiled at him. He didn't buy it.

**Logan POV**

I totally just flirted with Carlos and he flipped out. "I would love a straight guy." I sighed. James walked into the room with jeans on and wet hair. "Have you seen my Cuda mousse?" he asked concern on his face. "Yeah James Carlos hid it under your bed." I said sadly. I sighed. "Is it Carlos?" James asked frowning. I shook my head yes. "I tried to flirt with him and he freaked out." I said with my head down. "I'm sorry man…there should be more guys out there like you and me." James said then his eyes widened. "James….you're gay?" I asked surprise on my face. "Damn…I didn't want to tell anyone. I was kind of ashamed." He said looking into my eyes. "James you know that we'll always love you no matter if you're gay, straight, orange, purple, green. You'll always be James to us." I said smiling at him. He smiled. "Thanks man, but don't tell the other two…because I kind of have a crush on Kendall." He blushed. "I kind of had a feeling." I said. He punched my arm "I'm gonna go find my mousse." "Alright Jamie" I laughed and walked out the room. "Gustavo called." Kendall said looking at me. "He said he's giving up a break today!" I smiled "Yes!" "Dude! We should go to the skate park!"Carlos said enthusiastically. "Yeahh we should." Kendall said smiling. James walked in the room. "James wanna go to the skate part?" Kendall asked smiling. "Yeah sure!" James said happily. "Alright Kendall hurry up cuz you're the only one who's not ready!" I told him. Carlos was smiling at me. I tried not to blush so I asked "Did you like the muffins?" "Yeah Logie they were grrrr-eat!" Carlos said then he winked…AT ME. James raised his eyebrows and laughed. "I'm gonna go down to the lobby." James said. Now it was just Carlos and I in the room alone (besides Kendall because he was in the shower).

**Carlos POV**

James left to go to the lobby. Me and Logan. Alone. He came to sit by me on the couch. I was watching Saw II. I absolutely hate scary movies. Something gory happened in the movie so I grabbed Logan's arm and put my head in his chest. I felt him rigid under me. Then I looked up at him. Our faces were only a few inches apart. He smelled like mint and cinnamon. I moved my face closer to his and felt his heart beat faster. Then someone screamed.


	4. Oh geeze! :o

**Logan POV**

Carlos was so close to me. He smelled like an Abercrombie model. I wanted to just grab him and kiss him, but then someone screamed.

**Carlos POV**

Someone screamed. Logan and I both jumped off the couch and bumped heads. "OW!" we said in unison. Then I realized who screamed….the person on TV. My moment with Logan was ruined because some bitch on TV decided to scream. FML! Logan and I were both holding a hand to our heads. "Sorry man." I said frowning. "It's not your fault." Logan said giving me a small smile. Just then Kendall walked in. "Oh my gosh what happened now?" Kendall said seeing that we were holding a hand to our heads. "We bumped heads." I said giggling. Just then Logan started cracking up. Then Kendall. Then me. "You guys are so clumsy!" Kendall said through laughs. "We should go now." Logan said still giggling. "Alright go down with James I need Carlos to help me with something." Kendall said. "_Oh shit!"_ I thought to myself. Logan left and it was just me and Kendall. "We needa talk." Was all he said. "No we don't, there's nothing to talk about!" "How'd you bump heads with Logan?" Kendall said crossing his arms. "Well –uh we both got scared cuz of the movie and we jumped up and hit heads." I said satisfied with myself. "Bullshit." Kendall said smirking. "Dude I—" I started to say but Kendall cut me off. "I saw _everything_!" Kendall said looking at me like I thought he was dumb. "Well I don't know what you saw." I said air quoting the word saw. "I saw you about to kiss Logan." "I wasn't gonna kiss him." I said angrily. "He had something in his eye." "So you're telling me that you have no feelings for Logan!" Kendall said raising his voice. "No I don't." I said wishing I could take it back and spill all my feelings about Logan to Kendall. "Logan is just a friend, nothing more…and that's how it should be and always will be." I said stabbing my finger in Kendall's chest. Kendall had a sorry look on his face. I didn't care, he was eavesdropping on me. But then I turned around and saw the reason for Kendall's face. Logan was behind me, his brown eyes filled with hurt.

**Logan's POV**

I had heard every word that they said. I can't believe I actually thought Carlos had felt what I felt. Carlos looked at me with a sad look on his face. I just mumbled something incomprehensible and turned around and ran out of the apartment. I didn't want to Carlos to see me cry for him. I felt stupid, weak. I went down to a vacant cabana by the pool and sobbed so hard. I put my head in my hands. _"He doesn't love you. Why would he? You're tiny, geeky, and unattractive. What do you have to offer him?" _ My thoughts said. Just then I heard someone coming in the cabana. I tried to wipe all my tears away. It was just James. He looked at me and frowned. "Does someone need a hug?" He asked with his arms outstretched. I nodded and he pulled me into a tight hug. I cried into his chest. "He doesn't love me James!"

**Carlos POV**

"Logan where are you going!" I yelled trying to stop him. "Soy un idiota! ¿Cómo podría hacer eso a él!" I said in Spanish because I was frustrated. I didn't want to cry so I held it in. "We need to go find him Kendall." "Do you know why he's so upset?" Kendall asked. "I have no clue, but I can't hurt him, I love him." I said. "Oh shit- I mean like –uh! Oh forget it I love that boy so much I can't stand it. He's always there for me, getting me out of trouble or helping me study or baking me muffins at 5 am. And – and…" I started crying. "I love him." Kendall pulled me into a hug. "Come on Carlos; let's go find Logan and get this settled." Kendall lifted my chin to talk to me. My eyes widened. "No don't tell him what I said…I will when I'm ready." "Of course Carlos." Kendall said pulling me back into a hug.

**James POV**

I couldn't stand seeing Logan hurt so much. It made me sad. "He doesn't love me!" Logan continued to say while crying. "What exactly did he say that makes you think that! I've seen the way Carlos acts around you. I can tell that he cares for you so much!" I said sternly. "Yeah James, as a friend…nothing more!" Logan was crying so much that he started to hiccup.

**Logan POV**

James and I both looked up when we heard someone coming in. It was Carlos. He immediately walked straight to me and pulled me into the best hug ever. Then he started whispering in my ear. "I'm soooo sorry for hurting you, you're my best friend in the whole universe .I wouldn't ever want to have someone else to be my best friend. Please don't cry because I'm a dumbass." When he finished he pulled out of the hug. I wanted to stay wrapped in his arms forever. I sniffed. "You're not just some friend. You're my best friend." I smiled at him. "That makes me feel so much better man." "So can we go to the skate park now?" asked James. Kendall punched his arm. "You guys go. I forgot that I had to help Camille practice." I said.

**Carlos POV**

"Yeah I'm gonna stay too." I said nodding. "Why?" James brow furrowed. "Because I…broke my skateboard." I said lying. "You guys go! Have fun!" Logan said winking at James. It made me jealous. "Alright! Come on Kendall let's go!" James said overjoyed. "See ya guys!" Kendall said smiling at us and walking toward the lobby. "So imma go upstairs...see you there." I told Logan scratching my head. "Yeah I'll go up there right now." He smiled.

When I got to the apartment there was a message on the answering machine from Mrs. Knight. She had been in Minnesota visiting family and had called to remind us that she would be home in a few days.

It was so hot in the apartment. I went into the kitchen. Logan had left the oven on! "Shit!" I turned it off and put a fan on to get rid of all the smoke. It was so hot that my shirt was sticking to me so I took it off. I sighed. I only said my skateboard was broken so I could spend time with Logan and he wasn't here. I shrugged and went into my room to find my guitar. I played the song that made me always think of Logan.

I started to sing…

"_He put it on me, I put it on…_

_Like there was nothing wrong._

_It didn't fit,_

_It wasn't right._

_Wasn't just the size._

_They say you knoww,_

_When you know._

_I don't know oh oh oh oh oh ohhh." _

I kept playing the guitar and sighed, my wind wandering. I started to sing again.

"_I didn't feeeel_

_The fairytale feeeeling, nooo ohh oh._

_Am I a stupid boy?_

_For even dreeeaaaming that I could."_

I continued playing the guitar. I am stupid. Why would I think that Logan would want someone like me? ME. Carlos. The big dork that trips over air and eats everything. I held back a sob and continued to sing.

"_If it's not like the movies,_

_That's how it should be, yeahhh._

_When he's the one,_

_I'll come undone,_

_And my world will stop spinninnnng!_

_And that's just the beginninnng, yeahhhh". _

A tear rolled down my cheek. Man I've been emotional lately. I wiped my eye and told myself to stop. Keep singing. So I did.

"_One hundred percent,_

_With every penny spent._

_He'll be the one that,_

_Finishes—" _

"_-your sentences." _Logan sang. I hadn't even heard him come in. I looked up startled. "Keep going" he told me. I smiled. And continued to sing for that beautiful boy. I poured my soul into that last part of the song.

"_'Cause I know you're out there!_

_And you're, you're looking for me oh oh oooohh!_

_It's a crazy idea that you were made,_

_Perfectly for me you'll see."_

I stared into his eyes while singing.

"_Just like the movies._

_That's how it will be._

_Cinematic and dramatic with the perfect ending."_

**Logan POV**

"Wow." Was all I could say. I knew that Carlos had a good voice but that was amazing. It was like he poured his whole soul into it. Carlos looked concerned. "Carlos that was just ...amazing!" I said putting my hand on his shoulder. "Thanks I'm really glad that _you_ liked it."_ Did he emphasize "you" or am I just imagining things. I'm probably imagining things…I'm crazy._ I thought. "Logan I…I need to tell you something." He said with his adorable innocent face. My heart started beating really fast. "What is it Carlos?" I asked trying not to sound like a scared little girl.

**James POV**

Now was my chance. Kendall and I were hanging out without Carlos and Logan. I had tried to make myself look as good as possible for Kendall. I was all smiles on the drive to the skate park. Then I noticed Kendall looking at me while I drove. It made me nervous. He smiled. "Why are you so happy?" I looked at him. He was so cute. Those emerald eyes were hypnotizing. "JAMES! Watch the road!" Kendall said as a truck came close to crashing into us. I pulled over on the side of the road. "I'm soo sorry Kendall I—"He put his finger to my lips. "It's alright Jamie." I blushed. "Why are you blushing James?" Kendall asked giggling. "I am SO not Kendall!" I said totally embarrassed. "It's just hot out here!" "You're hot." He said. "Wha—" Before I could finish my sentence he pulled me into a passionate kiss. I was so shocked that at first I just stood there paralyzed and he pulled away. "What?" he asked apparently sad. "I don't know…you surprised me." We were both red in the face. "No I get it James…I'm sorry." Kendall said walking away from the car. "What…wait Kendall come back!" I ran towards him and spun him around and put my face so close to his that our noses were touching.

**Kendall POV**

Our noses were touching. I could smell James' Cuda man spray which I secretly loved. I stared into his hazel eyes. I didn't realize how heavy I was breathing. Then James's face came slowly towards mine and he kissed me lovingly. It lasted for a while. Finally we broke apart. He whispered in my ear … "That's how our first kiss should've been…not a surprise ninja attack on me." I got chills then laughed. I was so happy because I had loved James so much and we were finally "together"…wait were we? "James?...Does this mean were uh…" I tried to ask but there were too many butterflies in my stomach. "Boyfriends?" James asked. "Do you want to be my boyfriend Kendall Knight?" He asked batting his beautiful eyelashes. "I would love nothing more than to be your boyfriend James Diamond."

_So hey! How you liking my story so far? Soo if you didn't get the song. It's saying that if there love is not like the way it is in the movies then that's the way it should be…not like the movies haha. So I put that song because "in the movies" it's a girl and boy in love and everything turns out well and Carlos and Logan are two guys who have trouble telling each other their feelings. If you've never heard this song I suggest that you listen to it because it's just amazing! :] I wonder if Carlos is gonna tell Logan….hmmm. :] _

**Please review! Tell me if you loved hated it or whatever! Just don't be mean about it…or I'll cry. haha. The more reviews I get the happier I am the happier I am the more I want to keep writing! :]**


	5. KamesCargan? hmmmm:o

**James POV**

I looked into Kendall's bright green eyes and smiled. I felt complete and happy. "Do you still wanna go to the skate park?" Kendall asked smirking at me. "No, let's go to the beach so we can lie next to each other under the sun." I said seductively. "Sounds like a plan to me handsome." Kendall said kissing my cheek and walking around me to get back in the car. I sighed. I never thought my life could be this great. I looked up at the sky and said "thank you Lord!"

**Carlos POV**

My heart was pounding rapidly. I could hear it in my ears, but I had to tell Logan that I loved him. I couldn't just keep my feelings bottled up. "What is it Carlos?" he had asked. Hearing him say my name made me even more nervous. "I—" I was cut off my phone ringing. _"I'm a Barbie girl! In a Barbie world!" "_James?" Logan asked laughing. "Yeah sorry." I said chuckling. We had all set our ringtones to Barbie Girl when James called us. I was annoyed, stupid James had to call now of all times. "What do you want James?" I asked the annoyance obvious in my tone. "Who pissed you off!" James said laughing. "You! Now what do you want?" I said a little cooler. "Oh, yeah I just wanted to tell you guys that we might be home late so you don't worry." "Oh alright man, you having fun with Kendall?" I asked. "Oh believe me… I am!" and he hung up. "That was weird." I said pressing end on my phone. I looked at Logan and he looked guilty. "What…is there something on my face?" I asked.

**Logan POV**

I couldn't help but check Carlos out while he talked on the phone. I watched him furrow his brow. He looked so cute. His body was so toned, I wanted to reach out and touch him. Suddenly he hung up the phone and looked at me. He questioned me and I started to sweat. "No there's nothing on your face! Just eyes, a nose, lips, and eyebrows!" I laughed nervously and gulped. "Now what were you gonna tell me?" I asked out of nervousness. _Why'd I remind him, dammit_. I thought.

**Carlos POV**

"Oh..yeah" I lost my breath for a second then gulped. I could feel so many butterflies in my stomach. Then Logan gave me a reassuring smile and I lost it. "Uh….Logan just..uh gimme a sec…I'll be right back. I ran to the restroom and locked it. I looked at myself in the mirror. I was all red and sweaty. "UGGH!" I said. I splashed cold water on my face and tried make myself look less red. "You can do this" I told myself. I went back into the room and Logan was texting someone. When he heard me walk in his phone flew up in the air and a small scream escaped his lips. I laughed. "Sorry, did I scare you!" "Yeah, a little Logan said scratching the back of his head. He retrieved his phone and went to sit on the bed with me again, "Soo…." He asked. "OH uh yeah I needed to tell you something!" "Well I just wanted to tell you that I … I'm in love with yo—someone and I don't know if they love me back. I don't know what to do and I really need your help Logan because you're my best friend and the one I trust the most."

**Logan POV**

As much as I hoped he was talking about me, he probably wasn't. "Who, Carlos?" I asked my voice a little shaky. "I don't know if I should say…" Carlos said with a distant voice. I put my hand on his knee and moved closer to him. "Tell me Carlos." I sounded demanding. Carlos' breath got faster as if I had scared him. His brown eyes, filled with innocence, scanned mine. "All my life Logan, I've been judged. When I was little, kids would tease me about being the dark kid. When I got older people teased me about my height and the way I acted. They called me names and judged me without knowing me. It hurt Logan. Everyone hurt me. Except you." He started to cry. "And I don't want to mess that up by telling you who because I know don't want to be judged by my best friend." I pulled him into a hug. "I would NEVER judge you! EVER. I accept you for you. I didn't know that people picked on you. I mean why would they? Unless they're jealous because they can't enjoy life the way you do. You take simple things and make them amazing Carlos. You're amazing my friend."I pulled out of the hug and looked straight into his eyes. We were so close that our noses were almost touching. Carlos mumbled something. "What was that?" I asked breathlessly.

**Kendall POV**

When Jamie and I got to the beach it was basically empty. "Score!" James said. He was so cute. We parked the car right on the sand. James took a big blanket from the trunk and laid it on the sand. Then he took his shoes and shirt off and sat on the blanket. He looked at me and patted the seat next to him. I immediately went toward him. I also took my shoes off but left my shirt on. I laid my head on his muscular chest and listened to his heart beat.

**James POV**

I felt at ease with Kendall. Everything just felt right. I looked down at the boy lying on my chest. "So how long have you 'liked' me?" I asked smiling. He blushed. "Ever since we got to Hollywood. I always felt like I was the closest to you before but when we got to Hollywood my feelings for you got stronger. You're just so perfect to me. Not just your looks though. You always make me laugh and cheer me up. And when I'm having a bad day I just wanna hang out with you. And you always smell soooo good." I stared at the ocean until Kendall looked up at me concerned. "Did I say something wrong?" he asked. "No, it's just…no one has ever said so many nice things about me before."

**Kendall POV**

I felt water hit my head. I looked up and saw that James was crying. "James, don't cry babe." I said trying to comfort him. "Kendall, I'm not crying because I'm sad. I'm crying because I've never felt happier than I do now with you." We both looked at each other and smiled. He kissed my forehead then got up and walked toward the ocean. I followed and jumped on him when we got close to the water. We both fell face first into the icy cold water. "My hair!" James screamed. I came up out of the water cracking up. At first James looked mad but then he started laughing and jumped on me. We rolled around and played in the water for hours until James collapsed on the floor laughing. "Kendall! I've never had this much fun!" he said smiling at me with his pearly whites. I plopped down next to him. "Well when you're with me I'll be sure to always give you a good time. I winked at him. He blushed.

**Logan POV**

"Ca-ca-Carlos what did you say?" I asked. It was so hard for me to think straight when the boy I loved lips were just inches from mine.

**Carlos POV**

I was trying to tell him but my voice was stuck. I just mumbled incoherently. I couldn't think, my mind turned to mush. I found my voice and told myself to be strong. "Logan." I said. "Y-y-es." He stuttered. "I'm in love with you." Then I crushed my lips against his.

**A/N: People tend to tell me I'm evil…I wonder why? Haha so I hope you liked this chapter and the ending! :] PLEASEEEE REVIEW! I haven't been getting a lot of reviews and it discourages me :[ So PLEASE review! :] BTW Who saw Big Time Concert! I LOVEDD IT! Carlos is a great supppperrr heroooo! :]**

**I will update in a day or two! :] YES I WILL! YES I WILL! :] (review if you get it! ):]**


	6. WHATTT!

**A/N:Lots of drama in this chapter. It's not very cheerful! You have been warned! :o**

**Logan POV**

"I'm in love with you." He had said. Suddenly his lips crushed against mine. I felt an eruption of emotions. I kissed him back and felt him smile. I wanted him so bad but something told me this was wrong. I suddenly pulled away and looked at him with wide eyes. He stared back at me like a kicked puppy and his bottom lip quivered. "No….no..no no no! NO." I said. I turned to walk away but looked back at him. He just gave me this sorry look. I jetted out the door.

**Kendall POV**

I started rubbing his leg. I heard his breath accelerate. "K-Ken-en-dall! STOP!" he said moving my hand away. "I'll have you know I go to church every Sunday!" "Damn that's hot James." I said staring seductively in his eyes. I grazed my finger up his washboard abs. He shivered. "So, you're a good boy James?" I whispered into his ear. "I –I- I-uh-I sup-pppose." "Good boys wouldn't be turned on by this." I said in a sexy voice. "Wh-o-o says I'm turned on!" James laughed nervously. "No one needed to say anything James." I said with a smirk looking down at his pants.

**Carlos POV**

Logan ran out the door and left me all alone. I grinded my teeth and started crying. I got up and kicked a book , a picture came flying out of it. I picked it up. It was of Logan and I. I tore the picture up and threw it on the floor. "Damn. How could I be so stupid?" I asked myself while sobbing. I covered up my eyes and started pacing. _Logan doesn't love you. _I heard my thoughts say. "SHUT UP! SHUT UP SHUT UP!" I grabbed a vase off a table and threw it across the room. Then I slid down the wall sobbing. The vase broke…just like my heart.

**Logan POV**

I stood outside the apartment and heard it all. I closed my eyes and a tear rolled down my cheek. I had made him like this. This was all my fault. I began to weep. I wanted to go in there and make it all better. But I knew that would only make it worst. Why did I have to be so insecure about my feelings. I knew I loved Carlos more than anyone else in the world. I kicked the door out of blind fury. "WHO THE FUCK IS THERE!" I heard Carlos scream from inside. "Oh dang!" I said to myself as I ran away from the apartment.

**Carlos POV**

I opened the door and no one was there. "Gosh dammit!" I slammed the door closed. "I'm sick of always being turned down!" I sat down on the couch and turned the TV on and Big Time Rush was on the news. "Son of a…" I changed the channel quickly. '_The Notebook' is up next on Lifetime. _The TV said. I had never seen that movie so I decided to watch it.

**Logan POV**

I didn't know where I was going. I just kept walking farther and farther away from the Palmwoods. I heard police sirens in the area I was in. I stopped when I saw that I was in an alley. I remembered one time Carlos and I had joked about this. _"If you're ever in a dark alley, you can count on me to save you!"_ He had said. I doubt that he would want to save me now.

"Hey kid!" I heard a raspy voice say. I turned about and gulped. He chuckled "What's wrong pretty boy? You look a little scared."

"L-leave me a-alone." I stuttered.

He gave me a harsh look. "Gimme all the money you got. NOW!"

"No! Fuck off!" I said ,trying to be tough. He pushed me against the wall and pulled out a pocket knife and put it at my throat. I was scared. I wanted Carlos, he would've kicked this guy's ass.

I felt the knife dig into my skin a little. "Ah!" I let out a little scream.

"I ain't gonna ask again kid! Now give it up!" Suddenly I heard police sirens coming closer.

"Get away from that boy!" I heard a familiar voice say. The guy put me down and ran towards the police with the knife. An officer quickly pulled a taser on the man. I looked away not wanting to see a man being electrocuted.

"Logan?" I heard a man say. I looked up, it was Officer Garcia, Carlos' dad. He walked up to me. "Are you okay?" he asked concerned. "Yeah..I think so." I said even though I felt like breaking down crying.

"What are you doing over here? This is a bad area." He said in a fatherly way. "Well, Carlos and I kinda got in a fight and I needed to clear my head so I started walking and yeah…"

"Why were you and Carlos fighting?" I knew the question would be asked. "I really don't wanna talk about it right now." I told him. He looked at me for a second then said, "Alright. Let's get you back to the Palmwoods." I went into the cop car and looked at the time. 6:37 p.m it read. Had I really been gone _that _long!

**James POV**

Kendall was trying to seduce me. But he didn't understand that I was a good boy! "Kendall _please_ stop." I said giving him puppy eyes. He frowned. "Sorry, I was just trying to be…sexy." He said turning as red as a tomato, "Aw! You are sexy Kendall! But I like to take things slow." He smiled. "I totally understand." He said as his face got closer to mine and our lips met once again. I got butterflies every time I kissed that boy. If this wasn't love then I didn't know what love was. We finally broke apart from the kiss. "We should get home." I whispered in his ear. He looked hesitant. "Yeah, we probably should." We walked hand in hand back to the car. On the car ride home Kendall and I sang along to the radio and made each other laugh. Before we reached the Palmwoods, Kendall looked at me and opened his mouth but his words seemed to be stuck. "What's wrong Kendall?" I asked. "Well it's just that, I don't think we can show affection for each other in front of everyone at the Palmwoods. I mean if we weren't famous, I'd be showing so much p.d.a that it would annoy people. I just think it's best for the band if we keep our relationship on the dl." He looked at me frightened when he finished. "I think you're right Kendall. But we should at least tell Carlos and Logan." I said smiling. "Yeah of course we'll tell them. " We kissed me one last time before entering the Palmwoods.

**Carlos POV**

I sat and cried and cried. This movie was so sad. I probably looked like a wreck. I had an ice cream carton in my hand and I was wrapped in a blanket. The door flew open and Kendall and James came in giggling and talking. When they both saw me they stopped laughing and ran to my side to comfort me. "What's wrong Carlitos?" Kendall asked turning off the TV. A tear rolled down my cheek. "Can I talk to you alone?" I asked. Kendall looked at James and James left the apartment. "What's wrong buddy?" Kendall asked with concern in his voice. I started to cry while telling him. "I- I- I kissed Logan and ….*sobs* he freaked out!" Kendall hugged me. "I'm sure he didn't freak out, he's probably just confused." I broke out of the hug. "He's not fucking confused Kendall!" I said angrily. "I'm confused! I should like girls! Not Logan!" I put my head in my hands and sobbed into them "He loves you Carlos, he told me." Kendall said rubbing my back. I slowly looked at him scanning his face. "Don't you give me that BULLSHIT!" At that moment, the door opened and a tear stained Logan walked into the room with my dad.

**Officer Garcia POV**

Logan had told me everything. He told me that my son was gay and in love with him. I had asked him if he felt the same about Carlos. He hadn't responded, he just broke down crying. I hadn't questioned him further. When we reached the apartment the first thing I saw when I opened the door was my son crying and yelling with a carton of ice cream next to him and Kendall trying to comfort him. The image itself was pathetic.

**Narrator POV**

When Carlos noticed that his dad and Logan had walked into the apartment, he got pissed. "You went and told my dad…you son of a bitch." Carlos ran towards Logan trying to hit him but Kendall and Officer Garcia caught him before he hit Logan. "LET ME GO!" Carlos yelled whimpering. "CARLOS ROBERTO GARCIA! WE NEED TO TALK NOW!" Officer Garcia said strictly. Kendall let go of Carlos and Officer Garcia dragged Carlos into his room.

**Carlos POV**

My dad had dragged me into my room. I was so pissed off. My perfect day had turned into the worst day of my life. " What is going on Carlos?" my dad had asked apparently stressed out. "I would've thought that that _bitch_ would've told you by now!" I yelled at him. "Hijo de su pinche madre, no gritas Carlos!" "I'm sorry Papi, it's just that I've had the worst day ever, and everyone's blaming all this shit on me!" I said breathing heavy. "Do you _love_ that boy Carlos?" my dad looked ashamed as he asked. I took a while to respond. "No dad, I don't even know what's wrong with me. I'm not gay at all. And I especially do not love Logan. I like girls…a whoooole lot!" "Then what's with the crying and the ice cream and being so mad?" he asked annoyed. "Dad it's a phase I'm going thru I guess!" I said putting my hands in the air. "I know for a fact that I like girls! I just was curious I guess but I'm over it okay!" He looked at me skeptically . "Okay, if you're sure."

**Logan POV**

I am stupid. I can't even believe myself. I fucked up. I heard Carlos and his dad yelling. "All this crap is my fault." I told Kendall. I heard Carlos yell from our room, _"…I especially do not love Logan…" _ I bit my lip trying to suppress a sob. I couldn't control myself. I started pacing but then sat down. "This is all my fault Kendall, I'm a dumbass, why do I have to be so dumb!" At that moment the door to the apartment opened and James peaked in. "Can I come in yet, Bitters is getting mad at me for hanging in the lobby." He said. "Yeah, sure." Kendall said running his hands thru his own hair. Officer Garcia came out of me and Carlos' room. "You guys take good care of him. He can be crazy sometimes." He told us as he left the apartment. "I'm sorry for all this stress on you Kendall." I said looking at him with puffy eyes. "Dude, don't worry about it. That's what friends are for." He said with a small smile.

**Carlos POV**

This entire day was full of stress. I was done caring though. All I ever did was care and people had stepped all over me. I was done with it. No one else matters, just me. I had to rebel and that's exactly what I was gonna do.

**A/N: Sooo whatchoo think of this chapter! Drama much? This chapter was sooo fun to write. What's Carlos gonna do? I'm sorry if you think this chapter is bad or mean or sad. I had to surprise you! :] I love all your reviews! Hey! If you like the story please review or give me your ideas of what you think is gonna happen or what you want to happen! :]**

**Love you all! :]**


	7. Confused Carlitos

**A/N: WARNING THE FOLLOWING STORY MIGHT MAKE YOU SAD. PLEASE STOP NOW IF YOU DON'T WANNA BE SAD. :[**

**Kendall POV**

It was 9:50 am and Carlos was still not at practice. Last night was just terrible for him and Logan to say the least. James and I had decided not to tell Carlos and Logan yet about our relationship because of the circumstances. Carlos had stayed in his room the rest of the night after his dad left. I had asked Logan if it was alright to tell James everything that happened and James promised to keep quiet. Logan told us what had happened in the alley and how he heard Carlos release his anger on a vase. When we tried to wake Carlos up this morning he said that he'd be up in time, but he was almost already 2 hours late.

**Logan POV**

I hadn't realized how much I had hurt Carlos…and myself. He wouldn't even wake up this morning and was late to practice.

I sighed. "I'm sorry you guys, it's my fault that Carlos is acting like this." I told Kendall and James.

"Nah it's not your fault buddy, you know Carlos he'll be running thru that door any minute now with his helmet on his head acting like nothing even happened." James said with a fake smile.

I gave him a weak smile. "I sure hope so." I whispered.

"WHERE IS THE OTHER DOG?" Gustavo had asked for the 100th time.

"We told you Gustavo! He didn't feel well this morning so we let him sleep in a little, he said he'd be here later though." Kendall said with a worried expression.

"WHY CAN'T HE JUST BE A MAN AND COME TO PRACTICE!" Gustavo roared.

As if on cue Carlos walked in the room, and he looked sooo hot. He had on jeans that fit perfectly around his legs; a tight red shirt that showed off his sexy six pack with a black leather jacket on top and his hair was the right amount of messy….he looked like a badass. Carlos pulled Gustavo by the shirt and pushed him against the wall.

"Don't be talking _shit_ about me behind my back! I showed up so I don't see what the big deal is!" He let go of Gustavo's shirt and went into the recording booth. Kelly and Gustavo both had a shocked look on their faces.

"Uhmm…okay guys we need to practice harmonies today so uh do your warm-up exercises." Gustavo said calmly. We started warming up our voices.

Carlos looked at us. We flinched. He smirked. "Sorry for being late." He said with a laugh.

Practice had gone smoothly even with Carlos's weird behavior. I had to fix this though. I missed the happy dorky Carlos so I went to go talk to him about it.

When I approached him he raised his eyebrows and said "'Sup." I smiled weakly at him. "Carlos, man I'm really sorry about—""Woah woah dude, it's all good!" Carlos said hitting me on the back a little too hard. "I don't know what my deal was yesterday, I probably ate too much." He laughed but it wasn't his laugh. My Carlos had a laugh that made people smile. This one just sounded mocking and rude. "Ha...yeah so are we cool?" I asked. "Yeah... I guess?" Carlos sounded like it was more like a question than an answer. Suddenly Camille walked by us. "Aye man you still like Camille?" Carlos asked jabbing me in the ribs. "I—" I tried to say something but before I could Carlos said "Cool man!" and started walking towards Camille.

**Carlos POV**

I've told myself that I shouldn't give a _fuck_ what Gustavo tells me. Who cares if he fires me? I could get signed by someone else in a heartbeat. Logan came to talk to me to see if I was alright. HA. Like he actually cared. He meant nothing to me now. I saw Camille walk past me and Logan. She looked fineee and I had heard that Logan liked her…time to piss him off!

I walked up to Camille. "Hey Camille, you're looking very beautiful today!" I said smiling.

"Aw thanks Carlos." She said blushing a little.

"So, I was wondering maybe you and me can go out sometime to see a movie or something." I said as I looked deep into her eyes trying to hypnotize her with my good looks.

She took a moment to respond. "I'd love to!" she finally said.

"Great! How bout we see a movie tomorrow at 7!" I said winking at her. "Sounds like a plan to me!" she giggled. "Alright see ya later gorgeous." I said walking away.

"_You're only doing this to forget about Logan," _my thoughts said. "No I'm not." I mumbled. _"So you don't miss hanging out with him every free day….seeing that crooked smile…having him help you with your homework…." "_NO!SHUT UP!" I yelled while I was still in the lobby.

Everyone in the lobby went silent and looked at me. I laughed nervously. "I'm talking on a headset…I'm not crazy you guys." Some looked as if they believed me, others looked skeptical. I walked up to the guys who all looked at me funny. "

What!" I asked with an annoyed face. "Nothing! Nothing." James said smiling. "I got a date with Camille," I said raising my eyebrows up and down. "Imma get some!" I said laughing and high fiving James. Kendall looked at James and rolled his eyes.

Logan rolled his eyes too and said angrily, "I gotta go to the library so see you guys later!" and he walked away obviously mad. _He's so cute when he gets all nerdy and mad. _Said my thoughts.

I shook the thoughts away. I should be happy, I had pissed him off. Kendall and James told me to follow them somewhere. "Aight!" I said like it was whatever.

They took me to the corner of the Palmwoods where no one was. "What's going on!" Kendall and James said in unison. "Pshhh what you mean what's going on!" I said acting like I didn't know. "You're gonna 'get some' from Camille?" Kendall asked yelling in an angry tone. "Yeaaaahh man imma tap that!" I said laughing. Then Kendall unexpectedly slapped me. I looked at him with my mouth open and my brows furrowed. "What the fu—" I started to say. "Shut up Carlos!" Kendall said angrily. "What's your problem! I know you love Logan! I know you're doing this bad boy cover up to get his attention! And you're dating Camille to piss him off! What is your problem Carlos!Dammit!" Kendall looked really angry and was breathing heavy. "I do not love him!" I yelled back him. I was so angry and I was gonna explode. "HOW CAN I LOVE SOMEONE WHO REJECTED ME THE WAY HE DID!YOU DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND! AND KENDALL DON'T TRY TO ACT LIKE YOU KNOW ME! I'M ME! THIS IS CARLOS! I'VE BEEN TOO NICE TO ALL YOU BASTARDS! AND YOU ALL STEP ALL OVER ME AND BLAME THIS _SHIT_ ON ME! I'M SICK OF IT!" with that I walked away from them crying. I didn't want them to see me cry so I walked away fast.

**James POV**

I just stood there and watched Carlos yell at my boyfriend. I didn't know what to do. When Carlos had walked away I looked at Kendall. He looked shocked. "I'm sorry, I should've defended you and—" I tried to apologize. "James, it's okay…Carlos is right. We do step all over him. It's all our faults."

**Logan POV**

I walked toward the car Gustavo had bought us. I was crying. I sat in the car and tried to stop crying. _Gosh…why does it have to be like this? I want the old Carlos back._ I thought. Carlos had tried to make me jealous by asking Camille out. Oh he made me jealous alright, but it was because Camille got to go on a date with _him, _the boy I was in love with…or at least I thought I was. I sighed. I wanted to go to the library to clear my head so I put the key in the ignition and turned it.

The car roared to life and the radio turned on….and of course Carlos and me's song was on! _"…when he's the one I'll come undone, and my world will stop spinning!" _ "Fuck!" I turned the radio off. "What are you trying to tell me!" I yelled at the radio and started crying again. I never knew that you could go thru so much pain over someone you loved. I turned the car off and I got out. I was much too depressed to go anywhere. I walked away from the parking lot and I saw Carlos making out with one of the Jennifers. Right then and there is when I lost it.

**Carlos POV**

I was so frustrated. Kendall had just pissed me off. That foo thought he knew everything about everyone. I walked to the pool to clear my head. That's when I saw the Jennifers walking in slow motion. I sat on a chair by the pool as they walked by and they said, "Don't even think about it." In unison. "HA! Please like I'm gonna waste my time on some snob ass bitches like you three! I mean I realized that I can get any kind of girl that I want! So you little snobs can just go prancing around like you're the shit and nobody's gonna care! Because in the end all you are are little insecure girls!" I said feeling very proud of myself. The blonde Jennifer looked at me disgusted and said "Whatever, I don't care what you say!" then she snapped and walked away with the anorexic Jennifer. But the black Jennifer stayed and said to me, "No one has ever had the guts to tell us something like that… and you're right….wanna make out?" I thought about Logan and decided that making out would make me forget him and told her, "Yup!"

**Logan POV**

"HEY JENNIFER GET OFF OF HIM!" I yelled, I was ready to beat her ass if she didn't move. Carlos and Jennifer broke from the kiss and looked at me.

"Wtf do you want?" Carlos asked with a mix of emotions on his face.

"I want YOU to be NORMAL!" I said walking up to him and grabbing him by the shirt.

Jennifer looked at us and said ,"OMG if you guys are gonna fight, I am _so _outta here. " and she walked away fast. Carlos shoved me and I fell on the floor. If we were going to fight it wouldn't have been fair. I was always the weakest and Carlos was the strongest.

"Why are you here Logan! What it wasn't enough seeing me cry or hearing me break vases! What do you want Logan! WHAT!"

He started walking towards me although I was still on the floor. I got up from the floor. "I want you Carlos."

The tears welled up in my eyes and I grabbed him by his jacket and pulled him into a passionate kiss. I felt him hit me upside the head and pull away from me. I felt like I had died inside. "Stop Logan! Stop playing with my emotions just get away from me!" he yelled and I could hear the hurt in his voice.

I walked towards the street crying but stopped in the middle of the street. then I turned around to face him. I wasn't going to give up on him. "Carlos I'm not playing with your emotions! I love you! I really do!" I saw his eyes widen and at first I thought it was because of what I had said. Then I realized that a huge truck was speeding towards me and was about to hit me. "LOGAN!" I heard a choked up voice cry and then I felt an impact.

The impact wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. Was I dead? Alive? I didn't know. Suddenly I heard a voice. "Logan…logan.. please be okay Logan…" the voice sounded weak but sad. I opened my eyes to see that Carlos was by me and we were both in the road. He was trying desperately to stay up but I looked at him and saw that his eyes were closing and there was blood dripping from his head. "CARLOS!" I yelled unexpectedly . "Oh…thank God you're okay." Carlos said as if he were in pain. "Carlos we need to get you to a hospital." I said as I searched for my phone. "I don't know if I can hang much longer Logie…I think I have a concussion and I can't stay awake much longer." I had taught Carlos all about concussions, he told me he would never get one because of his helmet. Where was his helmet now?...On my head. Carlos had pushed me out of the way of the truck and put his helmet on my head to protect me when we fell on the pavement. "Please Carlos! Stay awake! I love you!" I was sobbing so hard now as I dialed 911.

I told them what had happened and they came quickly. I had kept Carlos awake the whole time while he was put into the ambulance. They had told me that I couldn't ride with him.

**Carlos POV**

I had saved Logan's life. The truck was hauling ass down the street. I jumped on Logan pushing him out of the way of the truck and putting my helmet on him before we hit the pavement. I was now in an ambulance. Possibly going to die. I tried and tried to stay awake I felt my eyes get heavy and heard a strange long beep…

**A/N: I'm if this wasn't as good as other chapters! I've been really tired and busy and I tried to find some time to write this so I hoped it's good and I hope you like it! :] **_**Reviews are very much appreciated! **_**:] Is Carlos gonna die…? :o **


	8. I Need To See Him!

**A/N: Just because I'm in a writing mood and you guys are so amazing, I decided to post another chapter quickly! I hope you enjoy it! :]**

**Logan POV**

As the ambulance sped away, I had so much on my mind. My thoughts were getting all mixed up and it was hard to concentrate. Suddenly I ran towards the car and turned it on. I backed up out of the parking lot and zoomed after the ambulance. I didn't care if people were honking their horns at me as I cut them off and sped around them. I needed to be sure that Carlos was okay. I felt hot tears roll down my cheeks just thinking about him.

_He's gonna be okay...I know it he's Carlos, he's tough_. I thought. I should call Kendall, he should know about this. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and I saw that I had a new text message from Carlos.

"What the..?" I said as I stopped at a stoplight and I opened the text.

It said, "qiwhduibfcdb**hesdieing**kfdujbjubvgf" My heart felt as though it had stopped. _He probably just sat on his phone…It's probably just a coincidence. _I thought as I felt myself getting more and more nervous by the minute. I heard people honking their horns behind me and looked up to see that the light was green. I whizzed past the light going really fast now. I had to get to Carlos, My Carlos.

**Kendall POV**

I felt so bad about what I had told Carlos. "Man, James I shouldn't have been so mean."

James looked at me and said, "Carlos knows we all love him, you should just go and apologize to him. I'm sure he'll understand."

He kissed me on my forehead. I smiled. We heard ambulances approaching the Palmwoods. James had a worried expression.

"We should go see what happened." I suddenly realized what James was thinking.

"You don't think that Carlos…." I started to say. "Let's just go." James said pulling me by the arm towards the Palmwoods parking lot.

By the time we got there the ambulance was gone but there were a whole bunch of people gathered around looking scared worried and sad. I suddenly got worried. I saw Jo crying and ran up to her.

"What happened, Jo?" I asked pulling her into a hug.

She looked up at me and tried to make herself stop crying, "Well Carlos pushed Logan out of the way of a truck and he got hurt really bad and the ambulance took him away."

She started to cry again this time sobbing harder. "Jo, he'll make it. He's tough. It's probably just a scratch." I said even though I doubted myself.

"No, Kendall you don't understand. They said he had a slim chance of surviving!" her voice was shaky.

I started to cry. I shouldn't have yelled at him. "We should go to the hospital." I said looking at James.

We both had tears in our eyes. Jo tiptoed and kissed me on the cheek. "Make sure he's okay Kendall." She whispered in my ear.

James looked mad and walked away towards the car. When we got to my mom's car I looked at James and sighed. "You're not mad at me are you?" I asked.

"No Kendall let's just go." He sounded angry and was staring into space.

"Look James, _she_ kissed _me_! Now I don't have time for this we have to go see if Carlos is okay. But you know that I love you more than anyone else I the world Jamiebear."

I grabbed his head and turned it toward my face and kissed him. He looked shocked but kissed me back. I smiled. "I love you, now let's go." He smiled and said, "Okay." Both our expressions turned to worried ones as we drove towards the hospital. We were both quiet the whole drive there.

**Logan POV**

I pulled up to the hospital and parked very crookedly in a parking spot. I ran into the building and ran up to the front desk. The lady at the desk smiled at me but then saw that I looked miserable and had been crying and her expression changed to a worried one.

She asked nicely, "How can I help you sweetie?"

"I need to see Carlos Garcia!" I said choked up.

"Honey, I'm sorry the doctors are doing everything they could, and I don't know if you should go in there."

"No…he's not dead...is he? HES NOT!" I yelled while crying. I had to hold onto the desk in front of me to keep myself from falling.

"Sweetie, the doctors are doing everything they can. Why don't you just take a seat and pray for him." She looked worried for me.

I pulled myself together and looked at her sniffing. Then I ran down the halls looking for Carlos's room. "HEY GET BACK HERE!" she yelled after me as she called security.

I looked in every room I passed looking for that boy. I stopped to catch my breath and saw that there was a room full of doctors and nurses. They were all surrounding someone. I tried to be sneaky and peaked in. A boy was laid on the bed, glistening with sweat. It looked as if his now pale cheeks had once been filled with life. The heart monitor had flat lined and I saw a doctor trying to revive the boy. My boy. My Carlos.

I covered my mouth and sank down on the floor crying harder than I ever thought I could. I wanted to run in there and save him. But how could I?

Suddenly a security guard in a yellow jacket came running around the corner and saw me crying by the door. His expression was mean but then turned sad. "You know you're not supposed to be over here." He told me as he crouched down to where I was sitting on the floor.

"I needed to see him." I said still crying.

"It doesn't do you any good to see someone you love in pain, boy. We only do this because we care." He gave me a small smile.

Another security guard came around the corner and said, "Ah! Good you got him! Let's go kid!" He grabbed me roughly by the arm and started dragging me.

"Hey man, cool it! I was trying to talk to the boy." The nice security guard said.

"You know you should just do your job!" the mean security guard said as he yanked me violently away from the room.

"NO!" I yelled kicked and screamed. "CARLOS! I LOVE YOU! DON'T DIE ON ME!"

The mean security guard beat me with a stick and said, "Shut up faggot!" I punched him in the face and in return was hit back in the face with his stick. I felt dizzy and saw stars as the security guard succeeded in carrying me towards the waiting room.

**Carlos POV**

I looked around. I couldn't see anything but darkness. I spun around in circles until I got dizzy. Then I saw a small light coming from somewhere.

_Oh no! _I thought. _Am I dead?_ "DON'T GO TOWARDS THE LIGHT!" I yelled at myself as I ran in circles. That's when I heard Logan's voice… "…. _CARLOS! I LOVE YOU! DON'T DIE ON ME!" _ "I love you too Logan!" I tried to say but nothing came out.

Suddenly I felt a jolt of electricity run through my body and my eyes snapped open. My head hurt and my throat felt dry. My vision was blurry and I could see a whole bunch of blue people around me...smurfs? Oh wait I'm in a hospital, they're doctors.

"Where's Logan?" I asked weakly. No one answered me. I felt myself being pulled to a sitting up position. I felt a sharp pain in my head and I scrunched my eyes.

"Can you hear me?" the doctor asked lightly.

"Yeah…" I whispered. "Where's Logan?"

"What's your name?" he asked.

"Carlos Roberto Garcia." I whispered again. "Where's Logan!" I tried to say louder but my throat hurt.

The doctor whispered something to a man in yellow and the yellow man left. "Logan is fine, son." The doctor told me. "I need to ask you a few more questions and then I'll get Logan for you."

"Okay." I said disappointed. I wanted to see Logan _now._

"Do you know why you're here?" he asked.

"Yes! I remember everything! You don't need to ask me any more questions!" my voice sounded strained and I looked at the doctor frowning. He looked at me and told me to open my eyes and look to the right and then the left as he shined a light in them.

"Okay you're good." The doctor said smiling. "I'm just gonna bring you some pain pills." He left and came back with two small pills and a glass of water. I swallowed the pills and then asked, "Can I pleaaaasse see Logan now?"

**Logan POV**

I was dragged into the waiting room and pushed into a chair. The security guard then handcuffed me to the chair.

"REALLY?" I said angrily with tears still in my eyes, "Is this necessary?" the security guard laughed at me and walked away.

A doctor walked into the waiting room a few minutes later and said, "Logan Mitchell?"

"Yes! Yes! What's wrong! Is Carlos okay? I needa see him!" I was so worried.

The doctor smiled at me. "He's fine. He's a little groggy but If you want to see him you may go back and see him. Just don't make him strain a lot."

"Thank you doctor." I said, I was so grateful. I tried to get up but forgot about the handcuffs. "Um…can someone uncuff me?" When I had gotten uncuffed I practically ran to Carlos's room.

I had peaked into the room and saw Carlos talking to a nurse. "You need to rest Mr. Garcia." She told him in an impatient voice.

"No! I want to see Logan!" Carlos said crossing his arms like a child. I walked into the room with a big smile on my face. The nurse instantly smiled at me flirtatiously.

"You can leave now miss nurse lady!" Carlos said smiling. The nurse gave Carlos a mean look and left the room. I went up to Carlos and held his hand.

"Carlos, I'm really sorry. This is all my fault. None of this would've happened if I hadn't acted so stupid." I said.

"It's my fault too Logie. I shouldn't have acted like someone I wasn't." Carlos looked at me with tears in his eyes. "I'm really sorry Logan."

"Don't be sorry Carlos," I said as I grabbed his head and turned it towards me. I slowly leaned closer to his face. "I love you Carlos Garcia." I whispered. We were so close that our lips touched when I talked. Carlos's breath hitched. Carlos grabbed the back of my head and pulled me into a provocative kiss.

**Kendall POV**

James and I had got stuck in bad traffic and we were beyond worried about Carlos. When we got to the hospital we saw Logan's car parked crookedly in a parking spot. That worried us more. Logan would never park crooked only if it was an extreme emergency. James and I parked quickly and ran into the hospital.

The receptionist looked at us and asked "Can I help you boys?"

"Yes! Uh were looking for  
C-Carlos Garcia." My voice shook with concern. She told us that he was fine and what his room number was. James and I sighed in relief. "I hope he's not in too much pain." James said as we approached his room.

**James POV**

Kendall stopped walking and his eyes widened. "What?" I asked confused.

"He looks fine to me!" Kendall said smirking. I peaked in the room to see Logan and Carlos aggressively making out. I covered my mouth and giggled.

**Carlos POV**

This had to be so wrong, but it felt so right. Kissing Logan made my head spin. I moved one of my hands from his head, down his neck, and onto his chest. I seemed to have done something right because he made a funny sound. I giggled thru the kiss.

**A/N: I have nooo idea what happens when you get a concussion. I just know if you fall asleep there's a possibility that you can die! So if I got any of the infoo wrong…sorry! Haha I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I don't know if it's the best but still please **_**REVIEW**_**! :] Still more chapters to come. Goodness Carlos and Logan…so many emotions bottled up haha! :]**


	9. Reunited! but wait

**Logan POV**

I woke up to the sound of a soft heartbeat. I looked up to see Carlos sleeping peacefully. I had fallen asleep on his chest after a long night of talking…and kissing. I smiled knowing that Carlos and I were a couple. Last night we had talked about everything. The first time we had noticed our feelings for each other, why we didn't do anything sooner, _everything_, and I had fallen asleep with my head on his chest_. _His lips twitched into a smile as he woke up and noticed that I had been watching him. I blushed, embarrassed that I had been caught.

"That's creepy Logan." He said in a playful tone.

We both giggled. "Is it?" I said kissing him on the cheek.

"When can I leave this place?" He asked me yawning. I stood up.

"Well, I think you can leave today! I should go check at the front desk." I said as I stretched.

"No!" he said like a scared little boy. "Stay with me, I'll page a nurse." I smiled.

"Okay baby." I sat in the chair next to his bed as he pressed the nurse button on his remote repeatedly. I laughed at him, he had such childish ways, but it was just adorable. A nurse came into the room looking very annoyed.

"How can I help you Mr. Garcia?" she said through gritted teeth.

"When can I leave?" he asked smiling. Her face relaxed as she put her finger up, signifying that she would be back in a minute. She came back with a clipboard full of papers in her hand.

"Now are you experiencing any pain in your head?" she asked looking down at the paper.

"Nope." He said shaking his head.

"How's your eyesight?" she said writing something down.

"Good!" Carlos said crossing his eyes. The nurse and I both giggled.

"Alrighty! Well just fill out this paperwork and give it to the receptionist downstairs and you're free to go!" she said smiling for once as she saw me and Carlos smile.

**Kendall POV**

James and I decided that we should just leave the two lovebirds to their kissing, so we both just went back to the Palmwoods. When we got in the car James immediately turned on the radio, but it seemed to be broken. "Crap! I wanted to hear some tunes!" James said sticking out his bottom lip. I just looked at him and laughed. "You're so cute Jamie." I received a smile in return. I began to sing for him.

"Baby, Baby Baby OHHHH!"

James laughed and joined in.

"Baby Baby Baby NOOOOO!

I thought you'd always be mineee

Minee!"

We didn't realize that our face were inches apart until we both stopped singing. James giggled and I turned red.

"We should probably head back to the Palmwoods," I said embarrassed. James leaned back into his seat. "Yeah, let's go." He said chuckling.

**James POV**

When we got home it was pretty late but I wasn't tired. Kendall was. He said that he was gonna go to bed.

"Alright, sleep tight babe." I said kissing him softly on the lips. I could tell he wanted more than just a soft peck. I laughed.

"You dirty boy." I mumbled to myself. I didn't feel like being in the apartment so I went downstairs. I had seen Jo and Camille downstairs and decided that I'd talk to them.

I reached the lobby where I had heard the girls talking. I heard them talking about Kendall, so I decided to eavesdrop.

"You think he's cute?" Camille said giggling.

"Oh hell yeah! He's very, very cute." Jo said in a seductive voice.

_He's mine bitch._ I thought.

"You should try to get with him." Camille said in a higher voice.

"You don't have to tell me twice." Jo said as they both laughed. I gritted my teeth and clenched my fist from where I was hiding.

"Did you hear something?" Camille said in a whisper.

"Nah, it's probably just the Palmwoods ghost again." They laughed again.

"So, I heard that Carlos asked you out!" Jo said excitedly.

"Yeah," Camille said as if she was bored. "But I'm just gonna use him to get to Logan, I mean they are best friends."

"You are such a bitch!" Jo said laughing.

_No you are_. I thought.

Then I decided that I should butt in. I walked into the lobby and obviously shocked them.

"Oh! James you scared me!" Jo said laughing.

"Ha-ha," I said mockingly. "Did I?"

Apparently Jo caught on, "Uhm, James is there something wrong?" she asked.

_Yes._ "No of course not!" I said laughing. "So, what were you guys talking about?" I said pretending to be interested as I sat down.

"Your band mates." Camille said smiling.

"What about them?" I asked trying to keep my cool.

"Well, Jo wants Kendall; I'm using Carlos to get to Logan, same as usual." Camille said.

"Yeah, oh really well. Carlos is in the fucking hospital and you want to use him. Also, Logan would never want someone like you who uses his best friend." I said angrily. "And you, stay away from Kendall."

Jo looked at me angrily confused, "Wha—"

"I said, stay away from him!" I said as I got up pointing my finger at her.

I had enough of them; I went upstairs and decided to go to bed.

**Carlos POV**

_I never really felt like I was important. But with Logan, it was different. He made me feel like I was the most important person in the world. Just the little things he did showed he cared_.

We were walking out of the hospital and I felt a little dizzy and swayed on the spot. Logan instantly caught me before I fell. "Carlos, baby are you okay?" he asked the worry was evident on his face. I looked at him and smiled, "I always am when I'm with you." He blushed but smiled. We continued to walk to the car. "Oh shit!" He said laughing. "I forgot to park the car straight." He said scratching his head. We both laughed as we drove home.

**Kendall POV**

When I woke up in the morning James wasn't there. I heard the front door open and heard Carlos's laughs fill the apartment.

"_Thank God, he's back_." I came out of my room and pulled Carlos into a bear hug.

"Man, I'm so happy that you're okay!" I said smiling.

"Dude, Kendall I'm so sorry about all that crap I gave you!" he said concerned.

"Don't even worry about it!" I said.

"Uhem, stop being all over _my _man." Logan said jokingly as he laughed. We all laughed.

"Where's James?" Logan asked.

"I don't know! I woke up and he wasn't here." I started to feel worried.

I bet you 5 bucks he's by the pool!" Carlos exclaimed.

We all went down to the pool in our trunks. We were looking for James, but we also wanted to get in the pool. All of us got glances from girls. We had normally went down to the pool with a shirt on, but today we were lazy.

"Ah! There he is!" Carlos said pointing to James who was half asleep on a pool lounger.

I shook him softly and he awoke abruptly. He instantly smiled when he saw me. Carlos nudged Logan and winked. "What are you doing out here James?" I asked chuckling.

"I couldn't sleep last night so I came down here hoping I could try to sleep." He said in a sleepy voice.

He then noticed Carlos. "Carlos! I'm so happy that you're okay!" He said standing up and hugging Carlos.

"Uhem hands off the merchandise!" Logan said playfully nudging James.

**James POV**

It was Logan's way of telling me he and Carlos were an item. "Aw, you guys are _finally _together!"I said laughing.

Logan and Carlos smile at me. "Dude, you look really tired." Kendall says with a worried expression as he moves my bangs out of my face.

"Yeah, I didn't get much sleep." I said with a sigh. "I think I'm gonna go up to the apartment and rest a little, if that's alright with you guys."

Kendall smiles at me, gosh he's gorgeous. "Of course it is babe." He says squeezing my hand.

Behind him Carlos punches Logan in the arm and mouths, "I told you!"

Logan laughed and cleared his throat."Why weren't we informed of this?" he said mockingly.

I blushed and looked down. "Because! There was too much going on at the time." Kendall said giggling nervously.

"Well were very happy for you!" Carlos says smiling.

"Thanks." I said still blushing," well see you guys later. I started to walk into the lobby when I saw Jo walking out to the pool. I sneakily watched as they went up to Carlos, Logan and Kendall.

**Kendall POV**

All the three of us were sitting on loungers talking when Jo walked up to us. Jo was wearing a very skimpy bikini, which was not like her at all. I admit I _used_ to have a crush on Jo, but now James was my everything. Jo was just a girl to me. "Hey Kendall" she said in a flirty tone as she sat down on the lounger that I was sitting on. "Hey Jo, what's up," I said as I read the back of a sunscreen bottle. She wanted my attention, but she wasn't gonna get it. "I could rub some of that on you, if you wanted." She whispered in my ear as she rubbed my back. I swatted her away from my ear like a fly. "Nah, Carlos can do it for me." She grabbed my face and turned it toward hers. Our faces were too close for comfort. "Do you want sunscreen all over you, or do you want me all over you?" Suddenly she pushed me back against the lounger and started to make out with me. I tried to pry her off of me but she was like a monkey; clinging onto me. Finally, I just pushed her off not caring what people thought.

**James POV**

I saw her flirt with my man. Now that pissed me off. But when I saw her start to KISS him, oh you don't even wanna know! I didn't want to cause a scene, so I just watched to see what Kendall would do. I would hope that he would get that skanky bitch off of himself. Call me crazy, but it looked to me like he was groping her. Tears filled my eyes. I knew it wouldn't last, why would Kendall want someone like me when he could get any girl he wanted. I sighed and a tear hit the floor as I turned towards the elevator. When I got to out floor I basically ran to apt. 2J to cry my eyes out.

**Kendall POV**

"What the hell Jo!" I yelled as I pushed her off me and she fell on the floor. Everyone was staring at us, and I became frustrated. "Kendall, babe I told you not to be so rough in public," she smirked at me. "You fucking bitch, I don't even like you! I don't have any feelings for you, whatsoever! So just get your skanky ass out of my face!" I said angry pulsing through my veins. "Oh Kendall, why so angry." So said acting innocent. That bitch just liked to provoke me. "I told you I was with someone, and you still fucking do this!" I said pinching my nose in annoyance. "Really? I f you're with someone, then who is it Kendall? Cause you refuse to tell me, so how can I believe you?" she said trying to seduce you. The whole time Carlos and Logan had just watched with shocked looks on their faces. Finally Carlos got up and said something. "Jo, you need to stay away from Kendall. He's with someone and if you think walking around in a skimpy bikini is gonna change Kendall's mind, well then you must not know Kendall very well. Kendall loves this person he's with, so you just need to back off and look for other fish in the ocean…Now leave." I tried not to laugh as Carlos told Jo to leave. "Whatever, you aren't even worth my time Kendall Knight! I hope you and your girlfriend have a terrible relationship!" she yelled as she stomped off into the lobby. "Oh badass!" Logan said mockingly as Jo left. "Guys, I don't think we should tell James, I wouldn't want him to feel bad. You know he's sensitive. Carlos and Logan both promised not to say anything.

**James POV**

I slid down the door of the apartment and cried my heart out. Why? You ask. Well I was just losing the love of my life, Kendall Knight, to a dirty blonde tramp and there was nothing that I could do about it. I felt useless. My heart felt like it had ripped out and stepped on. Was this the end of Kendall and me?

**A/N: Well, well children I hope you're enjoying the story! I'm sorry I have been so busy lately and I haven't gotten around to writing, so today finally I wrote. Even though I'm sooo tired right now! :) Is Kames no more? Will Kendall fix his relationship…or just make it worse? I want to thank everyone who has reviewed, which includes: BTRlover, Miss Ava Henderson , Team Jacob and Carlos 96 emo, ST3RLING KNIGHT'S ONLY LADY, TandrexTantrum, ohsoelectrik, unthinkable13, albert efron, Champagne Diamond, The Lady Steven, and ohaieric**

_**PLEASE REVIEW! IT IS VERY MUCH APPRECIATED! :]**_

**Please check out my other story if you like gory stuff and please review! :]**


	10. Is it over?

**James POV**

Why did I think that I could trust a teenage boy with a whole lot of hormones, around a whole bunch of girls in bikinis? I wouldn't let him touch me and now he was looking elsewhere to be loved. I was sobbing quietly sitting against the door of the apartment. That stupid girl had stolen my man. I wanted her to feel my pain, to know how hurt I was. I got up and tried to tell myself that maybe I didn't see correctly. Maybe Kendall didn't even kiss her. I walked into my room. I was tired and sad and I just needed SLEEP.

**Logan POV**

I felt worried that maybe Kendall should tell James. He would probably understand, besides it was bad to keep secrets. Carlos and I were soaking up the sun by the pool and Kendall was in the pool playing "Marco Polo" with Tyler. I looked over at Carlos who had his iPod on and was lip syncing whatever he was listening to. He was too cute, I wanted to climb over there and wrap myself around him; but I couldn't. We both agreed that we wouldn't make our relationship public, we didn't want any trouble from the media or fans or Gustavo. Carlos caught me staring at him and he winked at me and made a kissy face.

I mouthed, "Hey sexy." We both laughed but suddenly Carlos's face turned annoyed. I was confused but then I turned around and saw Camille coming towards us. I groaned. I did not want to deal with her right now.

**Camille POV**

I walked into the lobby and saw Bitters eating…as usual.

"Hey Bitters have you—" I tried to say but he cut me off.

"That's Mr. Bitters to you." He said with a mouthful of popcorn.

"Ugh, _Mr._ Bitters have you seen Carlos and Logan, I heard that Carlos got pretty hurt yesterday and—" he cut me off again and pointed to the pool.

"They're out there." Then he swatted me away.

I rolled my eyes as I walked out to the pool. I was wearing my brand new one-shoulder banded tee dress that I had just gotten from Victoria Secrets. I was hoping that Logan would notice how cute I looked. I strutted over to where I saw him. He was talking to Carlos, and call me crazy but it looked like they were flirting. Well they are best friends; they were probably just messing around. He looked annoyed when he saw me, which displeased me. But Carlos was the one who probably annoyed him.

"Hey Logan. Carlos." I said smiling at Logan.

"Uh, hey Camille." Logan said as he picked up a magazine and read it…except it was upside down. I cleared my throat and put my hands on my hips.

"I heard you were in the hospital Carlos, are you okay now?" I said trying to sound like I cared.

"Yeah, I am alright. Logan was with me the whole time, he's such a great friend." He said with a mocking smile. Logan snickered.

"Hmmph, well are we ever gonna have that date then?" I asked trying to make Logan jealous.

"Actually Camille, I kinda see you more as a friend and I was trying to make someone jealous, so I'm sorry about that. I didn't wanna lie to you so…yeah ha." He said nervously.

I laughed, "It's okay Carlos, I was doing the same thing."

"Oh, so we cool." He said smiling.

"Yeah, we're cool. So Logan is that upside down magazine interesting." I asked as I sat down on the lounger that he was sitting on.

He looked at the front of the magazine and laughed, "Ha. Yeah very interesting."

He seemed very uncomfortable. I grabbed his face and turned it toward mine.

"What's wrong Logan?" I asked in the sexiest voice I could make.

I leaned in to him when I heard Carlos yell. "DON'T…" I let go of Logan's face and looked at Carlos. Wtf was his problem. "..you think that it's just so hot out here, wooo! We should go Logan." he said as he got up and started to walk away.

"I'm right behind you!" Logan said walking away swiftly.

"UH!" I was mad. Stupid Carlos, why would he do that. It made me wonder…

**Kendall POV**

"MARCOOO!" I said as I swam around the pool.

I had agreed to play Marco Polo with Tyler and I was actually having a good time. A whole bunch of little kids had joined, and I didn't mind. I was always good with kids.

"I got someone!" I said as I touched Tyler on the head.

He started giggling, "Aw darn!" he said.

Just then Carlos and Logan both called my name and motioned for me to come over there.

"I'll be right back you guys," I said as I got out of the pool and walked toward Carlos and Logan.

"What?" I asked shrugging. "We have to go every girl out here wants to jump our bones!" Logan said nervously.

I laughed. Since when did Logan use the saying, "jump our bones".

"Dude, he's serious! Camille totally wants his junk!...but its MINE!" Carlos said. Logan and I started cracking up.

"Alright, but has anybody hit on you yet Carlos?" I asked smirking.

"No , but—" Just then Stephanie King walked by.

"Hey Carlos." She said as she checked him out. He waved, and then turned to me and raised his eyebrows.

"Alright let's go!" I said as I went to grab my towel. "Tyler, I gotta go! You guys have fun!" I shouted as walked into the lobby with my boys.

"HEY! Don't drip water all over my lobby!" Bitters yelled at me. "Dude chill I'm not dripping!" I said annoyed.

When we got into the elevator, Carlos and Logan started whispering to each and giggling. "You're my gorgeous little monkey!" Logan just suddenly said.

I looked at him, and then we all laughed. Carlos was leaning to kiss him on the cheek, when Logan turned his face to kiss him on the lips. "Ok! OK! Enough loved dovey stuff you guys!" I said feeling uncomfortable. They both blushed and said sorry.

When we got to the apartment it was dark and there was a message on the answering machine. I figured it was mom but I didn't want to play it because my Jamie-Poo was probably sleeping still.

**James POV**

"_YOU FUCKEN GOOD FOR NOTHING SON OF A BITCH!" Kendall said as he kicked me. We were in a dark alley and I was on the floor bruised up and crying. "You actually think I would want you!" he laughed manically. "I could get all the bitches I want, and you think that I would want your faggot ass!" he spit on me and then bent down and burned me with the cigarette he was smoking. I screamed as tears streamed down my cheek. "Why Kendall! Why are you hurting me!" I yelled. He put his foot above my face and slammed it down on my face._

I woke up screaming and sweating. The first person I saw was Kendall. I screamed again and noticed that my face was wet with tears. "Baby, it's okay it was just a bad dream" he said with a worried expression. "Come here," he said as he grabbed me and held me. He started stroking my hair as I whimpered in his embrace.

"Kendall…do you really have feelings for me..or are you just…I don't know, seeing what it's like with a guy.." I didn't want to ask it, but I had to know.

He hesitated and **I** pulled away. "James, I love you!" he said to me.

"You hesitated Kendall, and I don't know if I could trust you." Just then a tear rolled down my cheek.

"Don't say that James, you know you're my everything!" he said with a choked up voice.

"What about what happened earlier!" I said defensively.

"What are you talking about." His brows furrowed.

"Don't act like you don't know!" I shouted. "

I don't!" he yelled back.

"Fuck! I can't believe you can just lie to my fucking face!"

He got up and gave me a confused mad face, "What the fuck am I lieing about!"

My eyes suddenly flooded with tears. "You made out with Jo, and you thought you could get away with it." I said calmly.

Kendall's face relaxed. "No, James she kissed me! I pushed her off!" His eyes looked watery.

"Then why didn't you tell me about it if she's the one who kissed you?" I started to pace but then stopped and looked at Kendall. "I can't trust you Kendall, so… I don't think this is gonna work." I tried to keep myself from sobbing.

Then Kendall started sobbing. "James, no! NOOO! I love you! Don't do this to me." He walked up to me and grabbed my shirt. "You're my everything James! Please stay with me!"

I felt my lip quiver but bit it to hold back a sob. "Kendall, it's over."

"NO! It's not! James David Diamond I love you! Don't you understand that! I LOVE YOU!" he yelled at me while never ending tears came out of his eyes.

I just walked out of the room, not wanting to see the love of my life in such dismay. I saw Carlos and Logan on the couch sharing pudding, it made me sad. "You alright James?" Logan asked looking concerned. Carlos was frowning and his eyebrows were furrowed. "Yeah..I-I don't know." I said with a shaky voice.

**Kendall POV**

I felt lightheaded. I was sobbing so hard. I fell to my knees, I felt like I had just broken into a million pieces and half of me had just been blown away by an evil wind. How had this just happened to me. The best thing that had ever happened to me had just been taken away. I was in love with that boy, everything about him. I felt that if I couldn't be with James, then what was the purpose of living? My mind started racing with ways to end myself. There were endless possibilities. I could use a rope, but then I would suffer before dying. I had suffered enough in my life. I could electrocute myself…with _James_' hairdryer. Ok now I'm just thinking crazy. I had a headache, I needed an aspirin. Ah! Then it hit me! I could overdose on pills. I had to plan to do it when no one was home. I wouldn't want anyone to stop me.

**Carlos POV**

Logan and I were worried about James and Kendall. James told us he would be back in a little. Logan went to go check on Kendall and told me that Kendall didn't look good, and was taking a nap. I sighed. Logan rubbed my back. "Don't worry Carlitos, they'll be fine. If they didn't fight with each other once in a while, then they wouldn't have a normal relationship." He laid his head on my shoulder and I put my arm on him and pulled him in closer.

"Should we do something about it?" I asked, talking into his hair.

"No, we shouldn't butt in. I don't want to make it worse."

"Logan."

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

I felt him smile on my neck. "I love you too Carlos." He kissed my neck and it gave me chills. He laughed. "You ticklish Carlitos?"

"NO! Don't do it Logan." He unexpectedly started kissing and sucking on my neck.

"AH!" I screamed because it tickled. Then I felt that Logan gave me a hickey.

"Logan! Did-d you just give me a hick-eeeey?" I asked laughing.

"Mhmmm!" He said as kissed down my neck.

"STOP! No more Logan!" I said smiling. I wanted more but, you know. He frowned at me with big puppy eyes. "Logan don't give me that face! It won't work!" He leaned really close to my face almost kissing me, but then I realized he was just being a tease.

"Oh really Carlos? You don't want me to kiss you all over." He whispered really close to my lips. I licked my lips.

"La-hogan, you-u uh haha, um smell sooooo good."

He laughed "Do I?" he asked biting his lip. I wanted to bite his lip, he was soo gosh damn sexy. I couldn't take it anymore so I just grabbed him by the hair and pulled him towards me. I showed him who was boss, I flipped him over and pushed him on the couch and made out with him. He smiled through the kiss. I felt his hands on my butt.

**James POV**

I sat outside the apartment with my phone in my hand. I wanted to call someone to talk about it. I had looked thru my contacts like 5 times. I finally stopped on Kelly. Should I call her? I knew I could trust her, and she was the sweetest person ever. I pressed talk and waited for her to pick up.

"Kelly Wainwright"she answered cheerfully.

"Kelly, it's James."

"What's wrong honey, you don't sound too good." She sounded concerned

"Yeah.. I actually wanted to talk to you about something. It's important and you're the only one I trust. You busy?"

"I always have time for you James. Now what's wrong sweetie?"

"Kelly, I'm gay, and I was dating Ke-, this guy and I caught him cheating on me with a girl. So I broke it off and I still love him a lot. And I don't know what to do!" I had started to cry while talking.

"Aw Jamie, don't cry sweetie! I can't believe Kendall would do that to you! James anyone would be lucky to have you! So don't you cry, just hold your head high!"

"How'd you know it was Kendall?"

"I've seen the way you guys are during rehearsal…I'm not stupid."

"Kelly, the thing is that I still love him so much, but he broke my heart."

"Are you 100% sure that he cheated on you?"

"Yes, I'm pretty sure."

"Then let him go James, you deserve better."

I started to sob so bad. "Do I have to Kelly?"

"It's your decision baby boy, do what you feel is best for you."

"Thanks Kelly, I love you."

"I love you too honey."

I had sat outside the apartment just thinking for about 5 hours. I stood up and stretched. I walked into the apartment and saw Carlos and Logan asleep on the couch. They had left evidence of doing _something _on that couch. I went towards the door of the room that Kendall and I had shared. I put my ear to the door and heard little sobs thru the door. It broke my heart. I decided that I should sleep in Carlos and Logan's room tonight. They wouldn't mind.

I decided to call it a night. Everyone else was asleep and I was tired. I hadn't realized that it was kinda late too. I laid on Logan's bed and fell asleep quickly. That night I dreamt of my first love, Kendall Knight.

* * *

**A/N: Okay so I kinda almost cried while writing one part of this. Even though I didn't get a lot of reviews for the last chapter, I realllyyy felt like writing so, yeah! :] But if you don't review enough I'll take my sweet time writing the chapters haha. So I hoped you liked this chapter. Carlos and Logan are kinky and poor Kendall and James :[ Also here's the link to Camille's dress - **victoriassecret.com/ss/Satellite?ProductID=1265294625793&c=Page&cid=1265295712560&pagename=vsdWrapper

_**PLEASE REVIEW!**_


	11. Drama, Drama, Drama!

**A/N: THE FIRST PART OF JAMES POV IS A FLASHBACK :]**

**James POV**

"_James! James! YO DIAMOND!" Kendall yelled as he ran around the park looking for me. We were all 10 years old and we were playing hide and seek at Minnesota Park. I hid behind the tree and giggled. "He'll never find me-" All of a sudden I was jumped on. "GOTCHOO JAMIE!" Kendall yelled while giggling. We were both on the floor laughing. "Does that mean I'm it?" I asked frowning with my bottom lip sticking out. I also gave him the puppy dog eyes for that special little touch. He smirked at me, but finally gave in. He sighed, "Nooo James, you don't have to be it, but don't tell anybody I cheated." He smiled and winked at me. "I won't Kendall."I said pulling him into an embrace. "Don't tell Carlos and Logan, but I like you the best." He looked up at me from the hug and blushed. I felt a weird feeling that I had never felt for a guy. I mean I had felt it once for that cute girl Susie with the curls who lived down the block from me. But never for a guy…I had butterflies as I looked down into his green innocent eyes. Suddenly Carlos and Logan walked up to us eating ice cream. They both looked at us confused because Kendall and I were still hugging and it looked pretty intense. We untangled ourselves from the hug and looked at them. "Why do you have ice cream! We were supposed to be playing hide and seek!" Kendall asked. "Well I got bored and I wanted ice cream." Logan said in a matter of fact way. "And he bought me one too!" Carlos said sticking his tongue out…_

_*flashback over*_

I lay in Logan's bed thinking of the past…oh how I missed it.

**Logan POV**

I woke up to my phone singing, "Me so horny." I felt around for my phone but instead of touching a phone, I accidently hit Carlos' ass.

"Hey!" he yelled sleepily. Then he laughed because he heard my ringtone. "You like it; I changed it when you weren't paying attention." He said giggling.

I laughed and finally reached my phone and turned off the alarm on it. "You would...oh geeze Carlos why are we um…unclothed." I picked up some clothes and put it on and he did the same. We both stood up and he looked at me and laughed.

"What?"

"You're wearing my clothes, and I'm wearing yours." He said giggling.

I looked him up and down and sure enough he was wearing my white deep V-neck with my navy blue cardigan AND my skinnies. They were all a little tight on him and he looked freaking hot. "You look sexy with my clothes on." I felt my face grow warm as I said it.

"You're blushing!" Carlos said smiling as he pulled me into a hug and kissed me on the head.

"Stop your embarrassing me!" I said giggling and snaking my arms around his waist. I gave him a peck on the lips, and he smiled.  
Then his face turned serious. "We should check on Kendall and James."

"Yeah, you check on James, I'll check on Kendall." I said as I let go of his waist and made my way toward Kendall and James' room.

I walked into the room and saw that Kendall was lying on the bed. Little sob noises were coming from him. Had he really still been crying? It made me sad to see him like this. I walked toward his bed quietly, but stepped on a squeaky board and Kendall shot up into a sitting position.

**Kendall POV**

I had tried to sleep, but I couldn't. All night I had been tossing and turning, thinking about James. I had cried all night, and I couldn't believe how much a person could really cry. I had been lying there with tears streaming down my face when I heard someone walking toward my bed. I quickly sat up to see who it was. But, it was just Logan.

"Man, I'm sorry I was checking to see if you were okay…" Logan said embarrassed.

"It's okay Logan..I'm..I'm fine…" I said trying not to show him how sad I actually was.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" he asked.

I looked up at him.

**Logan POV**

Kendall looked up at me. His eyes were all red and puffy and it looked like he hadn't slept in a while. He looked like a zombie. "Oh my gosh Kendall, no offence but you don't look too good. "

"Well yeah, I couldn't sleep… I don't feel too good either, so I don't know if I should go to rehearsal today." His voice was shaky.

"Okay Kendall, if you need anything let me know."

He smiled at me. "Thanks Logan."

I started to walk out of his room, but turned around. "Is there anything that you want to talk about?" I knew there was, but I didn't want to force him to tell me.

He took a while to reply, and then said, "No, I'm fine."

**Carlos POV**

I walked into the room that Logan and I shared. I saw James laying face up on Logan's bed, with his iPod on and his eyes closed. I wasn't sure if he was awake or not, so I thought the best way to find out would be to throw a pillow at him and see what happened. James immediately jumped up and pulled his headphones out of his ears. "What the hell Carlos!"

"Sorrrry! I was trying to see if you were awake." I noticed that James had puffy eyes as if he had been crying and he looked sad. "Oh my gosh James, I'm sorry are you okay?" I went over to where he was on the bed and pulled him into one of my famous tight hugs. I heard James start to cry under me.

"Do you want to talk about what happened?" I asked softly.

James nodded his head no. "Could you just….um…."

"What?"

"Stay with me for a little?"

"Of course James."

He snuggled up against me. His head was in the crook of my neck and his arms wrapped around my waist. I felt awkward, but James was my friend so I had nothing to worry about…Right?...WRONG! James moved his face right next to mine. I admit James is a good looking guy, but I would never ever want to kiss him. He suddenly kissed me roughly and pushed me down on his bed. I tried to push him off but he is freaking strong! I finally pushed him off me and saw that he was looking at the door shocked. I looked at the door to see Logan standing there, eyes starting to water with a shocked look on his face.

**Logan POV**

"Alright then Kendall, get some rest." I said as I gently closed the door to Kendall's room.

I knew Carlos wasn't good at making people feel better, so I went to go check on James to be sure that Carlos hadn't done anything wrong. I turned the knob on the door and pulled it open. The first thing I saw was James on top of Carlos, passionately kissing him. James must have noticed me because he got off of Carlos and looked at me.

"Logan, no! It's not what it looks like!" Carlos yelled. I didn't notice I was crying until I felt hot tears rolling down my cheeks. I immediately ran out of the room and heard someone run after me.

**James POV**

I hadn't realized what I had done. All I knew was that I needed someone to hold me and love me, and Carlos was there. I didn't think about anyone but myself, and I had just hurt Logan and Carlos because of it. I ran after Carlos and Logan and saw that Logan had locked himself in the bathroom, and Carlos was banging on the door begging for him to open it. Carlos sighed and turned around and looked at me.

"Why James? Just because your heart is broken, you have to go around and make sure everyone else's is too. You selfish bitch."

He rolled his eyes and mumbled something about taking a shower in the other bathroom. I was selfish, I couldn't believe I had to mess up Carlos and Logan's relationship. But Carlos was so warm and adorable; kissing him was felt safe and comforting. No, I just miss Kendall and I'm thinking dumb. I walked over to the locked door that Logan was behind and knocked on it.

"Go away Carlos!" Logan was obviously crying.

"It's James." I said embarrassed.

"OH What the fuck do you want! You have no business kissing my boyfriend! You think just cause your fucking irresistible to everyone that you can just go and steal my man!"

"Logan, I'm sorry! I just felt… lonely! And Carlos didn't even want to kiss me, he was trying to push me off, so please don't be mad at him! He loves you! And again I'm sorry, I just don't know what's wrong with me right now."

Logan opened the door and glared at me. "That doesn't give you the right to mack up on my boyfriend…I need to take a shower, so…fuck you!"

The rest of the morning while we got ready for rehearsal, Logan and Carlos kept throwing me dirty looks now and then. They didn't speak to each other although it was evident that they were dying to.

Finally when we were all eating cereal, Carlos spoke to Logan. "…Logan, you know I didn't do it.."

Logan looked up at him, blushed and looked down at his cereal and shrugged his shoulders. Carlos sighed and looked choked up and he got up to put his bowl in the dishwasher.

"Let's go…Kelly's probably waiting for us in the lobby." Carlos said sadly. I could of sworn I saw a tear roll down Carlos' cheek as he turned and walked to the door. This was my fault, in fact everything was my fault lately.

**Kendall POV**

I had planned to do it today…I just needed someone to get me what I needed…and I knew just who to call.

"_Yo man, its Kendall…I was wondering can you sneak me a few 12 packs of Coronas? _

_*mumbles heard through the phone*_

_Yeah…and you got any prescription drugs.._

_*mumbles*_

_I don't care if I could accidentally overdose, just get me them._

_*more mumbles*_

_Alright, thanks._

In a few hours I would just be a memory to everyone. I hoped that I had at least made someone's life a little better. I went into the bathroom and looked into the mirror. It wasn't me. It wasn't the Kendall who stuck up for his friends, or laughed at the silliest of jokes. No, this Kendall was scared. I looked at the dark circles under my eyes and the pathetic look on my face. I had to get rid of it…I had to get rid of me.

**Carlos POV**

The three of us had met Kelly in the lobby and then followed her to the limo. I'm pretty sure she knew there was something wrong. I hadn't noticed that there were tears streaming down my face until I was in the limo and Logan reached his hand to my face and wiped them away. I looked at him sadly. "Do you believe me now Logie?" I asked staring intently into his eyes. "I-I don't know…"was all he said as he sat against the seat, sighed and closed his eyes.

**Logan POV**

I wanted so badly to believe Carlos. You don't know how bad I wanted to wrap my arms around him and lay on him. I didn't know who to believe and it was driving me crazy! I had kept my eyes closed until we arrived at Rocque Records. Hopefully Gustavo wasn't into a bad mood today; because, first of all Kendall wasn't here, and secondly he was about to be greeted by three depressed, unenthusiastic boys.

Once we were inside Rocque Records, the questions began to be asked.

"WHERE'S THE OTHER DOG!" Gustavo roared.

Kelly whispered something in his ear and I James' expression turn into a frightened one as he bit his lip. "WHAT! HE'S HEARTBROKEN! BULLSHIT! WHY CAN'T HE GET HIS LAZY ASS OVER HERE TO RECORD SOME MUSIC. WHAT A PANSY ASS!" Gustavo yelled at Kelly. Usually Kelly would keep her cool but today, I don't know what had gotten into her.

**Kelly POV**

These boys were like my babies. I loved each one as if they were my own child. So, when Gustavo got all pissy about Kendall not attending rehearsal and called him names, it was on.

**Logan POV**

Kelly slapped Gustavo in the face with so much force that he hand mark was left on his face. Gustavo's face was full of shock and Kelly looked pissed.

"Just because you have never loved anything but yourself, you don't understand what that poor boy is going thru! You don't know what it's like! You never give these poor boys a break and its breaking them apart!"

Gustavo's face was still in shock. And what he said next shocked us all. "Kelly…I'm sorry…You're right…I just."

He looked like he was gonna cry, but that's not possible because Satan doesn't cry. I looked at Carlos and James. Carlos looked like he was enjoying this, I couldn't help but smile to see Carlos like that. On the other hand, James did not look good at all. He was sweating and kept blinking and looked nervous. He was pushing his hair out of his face, this was odd for him because he usually wouldn't touch his hair because he didn't want to mess it up. Gustavo looked at us, "Dogs in the booth, now please." Carlos and I both began to walk toward the booth, while James tried to but almost fell in the process.

**James POV**

I didn't know what had gotten into me. I felt nervous and dizzy, and I felt like something bad was gonna happen. I tried to walk to the recording booth like Gustavo had said, but I almost fainted from just moving a little bit. Luckily, I caught myself before falling and leaned up against a wall. Gustavo came up to me and grabbed my chin with his hand and forced me to look at him. "James, what's wrong with you." I saw a blurry version of him and tried to focus but couldn't. "Kelly take him back to the Palmwoods, I think he's sick or dehydrated or something."

Next thing I knew Kelly was leading me somewhere. Once we reached the destination, I felt a cold liquid poured on my face and a towel wiping my face. I could see a little less blurry and I saw that Kelly had taken me back to the limo. I blinked and my vision returned, but I still felt terrible. "What's wrong sweetie?" she asked her voice full of concern as she pulled me into her chest and stroked my hair.

"I-I don't know..I just felt like I was dizzy and my vision went blurry…"

"Did you get enough sleep last night?"

"Like an hour…"

"We need to get you home to rest."

**Carlos POV**

James had just gone psycho on us. I don't know what happened to him. He seemed fine in the limo, but got all loopy when he got here. As mad as I was at him, I hoped he was okay.

"Alright Carlos, Logan. Since the better two are sick, I need you guys to practice the background vocals."

"Woah woah woah, hold up! The better two? We are just as good as them!" Logan said defensively. Logan was cute when he got mad, I smiled and nodded my head in agreement. "We can PROVE it to you Gustav!"

"I'm waiting!" Gustavo said. Boy were we gonna prove him wrong.

"Are you gonna play some music…so we can sing?" Logan asked Gustavo in annoyed tone.

"Nope! Sing acapella!"

"Even better!" I yelled into the microphone.

"Alright Logan, I'll start us off." He just shrugged…it made me mad.

"Now, I am about to give my heart so remember this one thing  
I have never been in love before so you gotta go easy on me." I sang and the whole time I looked at Logan.

**Logan POV**

Carlos had to pick this song to sing. Anyways I put all the soul I could into it. 

"_I heard love is dangerous  
Once you fall you never get enough  
but the thought of you leaving ain't easy for me."_

_[Carlos and Logan harmonizing]__  
"Dont hurt me, desert me, make me sorry I ever counted on you."_

_[Carlos]_

"_I understand I have been here before  
I thought I found someone I finally could adore "_

_[Logan]  
"But you failed my test  
Gotta know you better  
So I wasn't the only one"_

_[Carlos and Logan harmonizing]_

"_Now, I'm about to give my heart  
So remember this one thing  
I have never been in love before  
So you gotta go easy on meeee yeah!" _

Gustavo's mouth was open. I felt accomplished and smiled at Carlos. He gave me the look that he knew I always fell for. I felt myself blush deeply and he smiled.

"Well, I certainly did underestimate you two dogs." Gustavo had a pained look on his face. Was it really hard for him to compliment us? "Great job Carlos and Logan!" Carlos and I both had big goony smiles on our faces and it annoyed Gustavo. "Alright you're good okay? But now we have to get back to rehearsal. I need you two to sing "Any Kind of Guy". Now, I want you to sing it like you're singing it to each other, and don't think of it as something gay! Act professional about it!"

Carlos face scrunched up when Gustavo made the "gay" comment. Gustavo played the music and I started off singing. I gazed deep into Carlos' eyes and he looked nervous. He started to sing his part and looked back at me the same way.

**Kendall POV**

I heard a knock on the door. "Kendall! Man! You in there!"

"Just a sec!" I answered.

I ran to the door and opened it. It was Guitar Dude. He had a big brown bag and he quickly handed it to me. He whispered to me what was inside. Names of prescription drugs, different types of beers…etc. "Cool man…well see you…when I see you." Those were going to be my last words to him.

He looked at me sadly as if he knew what I was going to do. "Kendall do you—"

I closed the door in his face. There was no turning back from here. I went into me and James' room and looked for my iPod. I found his and plugged it into the iHome. I was gonna kill myself, might as well listen to some music as I took my last breath. I pressed shuffle on the iPod and "Are You Lonesome Tonight" by Elvis Presley began to play. One of the most saddest songs I have ever heard in my life.

"_Are you lonesome tonight,  
Do you miss me tonight?  
Are you sorry we drifted apart?"_

I sat on the orange couch and placed the brown bag on the floor in front of me. I looked thru it and found what I was looking for.

"_Does your memory stray to a brighter sunny day  
When I kissed you and called you sweetheart?"_

I pulled out a cold can and an orange bottle of pills. I popped the pills open and poured a few into my hand. I looked at them. Just taking these tiny little things could kill me? I opened the cold can of beer and looked at it. I was underage so I had never drank any alcohol before. I took a little sip. It was nasty. I poured some more of the pills in my hand then put them in my mouth and swallowed them down with the beer.

"_Is your heart filled with pain, shall I come back again?  
Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?"_

I started to cry. This was really the end. I thought of James as I opened another bottle containing pills. I poured them straight in my mouth and gulped them down with more beer. I felt as if I was going to throw up, but that would just make all the pills come up so I kept swallowing so that nothing would come up. I tried to stand up but fell on the floor , pretty hard. I lay there sobbing. "I love you James, I hope the rest of your life is filled with happiness and I hope someone fills your heart with joy and love…." I said it as if James could hear me. The last thing I heard was the ending chorus of the saddest song ever written….

_"Is your heart filled with pain, shall I come back again?  
Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?"_

**James POV**

I had fallen asleep on Kelly when we were in the limo. I had dreamt of Kendall and I. In the dream Kendall and I had our own house on the beach, we had adopted kids and we were living a perfect life. But suddenly Kendall had been sucked out of the dream like a vacuum and with a *pop* he disappeared. I woke up abruptly and saw that I was still in the limo and we were just arriving at the Palm woods.

"What's wrong James?" Kelly asked worried.

"WHERE'S KENDALL?"

"He's in the apartment…James are you okay?"

I flew out of that car so fast and ran to the elevator. I pressed the button like 20 times and it was taking forever. "Fuck this!" I ran to the stairs and ran up a whole bunch of flights. I never could run as fast as the other guys, but something made me run up those stairs like my life was at stake. I fumbled with the keys on the door and finally pulled the door open. The first thing I saw was Kendall lifelessly on the floor, with a whole bunch of pills and beers around him. I started to hyperventilate….

**A/N: OMG! So much drama! And Kendall killed himself…didn't he?…oh shizz! :[ Isn't it amazing how I could make so many things happen in just a few pages of writing… :o PLEASE REVIEW! I LOVE ALL YOU GUYS AND I LOVE BIG TIME RUSH! 3**

_**REVIEW!**_


	12. Say Goodbye

**A/N: This is a very sad chapter…just warning you! :/**

**Carlos POV**

I had to sing that song to Logan with so much passion, so that he _knew_ that I loved him and I would never do_ anything_ to hurt him. So, as I sang I gave him the "sexy eyes". I could tell they had worked on him because he looked like he was about to melt into a puddle. When we had finished the song we looked to Gustavo and he had a shocked confused look on his face. "Wow, that was…intense." He said with a sigh.

"Is that good…or bad?" I asked titling my head.

"Good...very good…" he said scratching his head.

**James POV**

You do not know how it feels to see someone lying on the floor lifeless. Especially, when it is the person you are in love with. To see Kendall's lifeless body…he looked like he had no hope in being brought back…back to me. We would never grow old together into two old grouchy men who sat on the porch waving their canes at children who stepped on their lawns. I started to hyperventilate and I fell to my knees clutching my chest. I had to do something; I couldn't just sit here crying. I pulled myself together and grabbed my cell phone and dialed 911.

"911 What is your emergency?"

"My-my boyfriend he…*sob*..."

"Please try to calm down and tell me what's wrong so I can help you sweetie."

"He overdo-do-do-sed on pills! And I- I don't kn-know what to-o do!"

"We're sending someone over there right now!"

I hung up the phone, knowing that I had done what needed to be done: I had called for help. Suddenly a rush of adrenaline came over me as I scooped Kendall up and threw him over my shoulder running down every flight of stairs. I got many frightened looks thrown at me as I ran through the lobby with Kendall lifelessly hanging over my shoulder. I heard the paramedics close by.

**Kendall's Ghost POV**

I felt myself being sucked out of something. Like a vacuum. Everything went black and I saw a bright shining light. It came closer and closer to me. When it was close enough I realized it was a woman. She was glowing and had a long white gown on. I observed her features more closely and realized that she looked very familiar to me.

"Who are you? Where am I?" I asked the glowing woman.

"Kendall, I'm your grandmother, and I'm also your guardian angel."

Suddenly it came back to me. I remembered spending weekends with my grandma when I was only a toddler. She had passed away when I was 4. She had overdosed on painkillers. A tear rolled down my cheek and I ran up to hug her. "I've missed you Granny."

She held me tight in her arms. "I've been with you all along Kendall, honey."

"I'm sorry. For everything. I messed up my life. I had so many things I could've done and I-I I'm sorry."

"Dear, you shouldn't be sorry. Everyone makes a few mistakes. And I could see that you loved that boy. You see love can be amazing, but it can make you do terrible things."

"I went crazy Grandma. I didn't know what to do what myself. I just thought that I shouldn't exist anymore."

"You had a whole life ahead of you honey. Do you want another chance?" I looked at her my eyes filled with tears.

"I don't want to leave you grandma."

"I'll always be with you sweetheart." She kissed my head. "And I want you to be happy and live your life and I see that this boy makes you very happy."

"He did…he was my everything."

"Well, Kenny honey, try and fix it." With that she disappeared and I started falling through darkness.

Suddenly I stopped falling and began to float down very slowly. I realized I wasn't in the dark room anymore, but I was back in apartment 2J. I looked down and saw myself dead on the floor. "You're stupid, you know that!" I said to myself.

Suddenly I heard the door handle jiggling and the door burst open as James practically ran in. I saw him drop to his knees and clutch his chest. It broke my heart. "JAMES! I'm right here baby!" I yelled but of course he couldn't hear me.

I watched as he panicked over me. Then, all of a sudden he picked me up and threw me over his shoulder. I never knew he was sooo strong! Then he ran out of the apartment with me slung over him. I tried to open the door to follow him, but remembered that I could go through walls. I followed him as he ran down the stairs. It was hard to keep up with him and he was even carrying extra body weight! I saw when he ran up to Kelly who was outside and she put her hand over her mouth when she saw me hanging dead in James' arms.

**Kelly POV**

I told the driver to wait a little before leaving because I was worried about James. It was when I had gotten out of the limo to go check on James when he came running out of the Palmwoods holding Kendall's limp body in his arms. "James! Wh-what happened!" I asked as tears began to fill my eyes. "He's dying Kelly!" James yelled tearing pouring from his eyes. Suddenly an ambulance pulled up and James handed them the dead body of Kendall Schmidt.

**Logan POV**

"Hey Gustavo, since we really can't do any practice…can we leave?" I asked although I was very scared he'd hit me with something for asking.

"Yeah, you guys can. You guys did…really…good today." he struggled saying this.

Carlos and I smiled at him and came out of the recording booth and gave him a group hug. "Alright, alright..ALRIGHT ENOUGH! I'll call Kelly to come pick you dogs up!" he finally yelled at us, but we still smiled and walked out of the studio.

Carlos held the door open for me as I walked out. We stood outside waiting for Kelly to come with the limo. I sat on the floor and put my head between my knees.

"Logie bear…I love you." Carlos said shyly.

I looked up and him and just stared for a long time. Then I stood up and kissed him lightly on the lips. "I love you too Carlos."

"I'm sorry about what James did, I tried to push him off!" Carlos said defensively. We both sat down and I put my head on his shoulder. "It's alright Carlos, I trust you and James is just going thru a rough time right now."

Carlos smiled deviously at me and whispered in my ear, "I want to do so many things to you right now, but I can't cuz we're in public." I felt my face grow warm as I blushed. He grabbed my hand that was on the floor and entwined our fingers. I smiled . I always felt happy with Carlos. I felt like I was safe. I loved him. But then our moment was suddenly ruined as the door of Rocque Records burst open and Gustavo came out franticly. "Kendall's in the hospital and he might not make it!" he yelled and he had tears running down his face, so this had to be serious. "Oh my goodness! Is he okay? What happened!" I asked frightened. Gustavo had explained that James had found Kendall pretty much dead next to empty bottles of pills and beer. Carlos began to sob as Gustavo walked us to his car and drove us to the hospital. I had my arms wrapped around Carlos as he cried and I let silent tears escape my eyes. I could imagine how James felt. I had almost lost Carlos and it was the worst feeling in the world.

**James POV**

I didn't get to ride with Kendall in the ambulance. I had to go in the limo. Kelly tried to comfort me, but I was shaking uncontrollably from crying. "What if he doesn't m-m-make it! Wha-wh-what if-f-ff he's gone f-f-forever!"

"He'll make it James. He's a strong boy!" Kelly said while crying.

My mind was filled with images of Kendall's limp body on the floor. My whole body was shaking and I couldn't control my heavy breathing. I stared out the window where I would usually see the bright sunny sky. Today there was nothing but rain and black ominous clouds.

**Carlos POV**

I was crying into Logan's chest. I couldn't believe that Kendall would try to commit suicide. I held tightly to Logan never wanting to let him go. Suddenly he was whispering to me that we were at the hospital. All of us stepped out of the car and were immediately soaked by the rain. When it started to rain, I don't know. We walked quickly through the rain, Logan and I holding hands.

Gustavo was right behind us and he didn't seem bothered by it. We burst through the doors and saw James and Kelly in the waiting room. James was a mess. He was shaking and crying with his head in his hands as Kelly rubbed his back.

"Did anyone call Mrs. Knight?" we heard Gustavo whisper to Kelly. Kelly nodded a yes and motioned for Gustavo to follow her somewhere.

**Kendall's Ghost POV**

I floated there in the waiting room with my friends. I never realized how much of an impact that my life had made on them. I now regretted my decision. I could've been with them now...alive. I floated over to James and tried to hug him, but was unsuccessful. He shivered when I tried to touch him and looked up alertly.

"What's wrong James?" Carlos asked thru sniffles.

"I-I felt…never mind…" he ran his hands thru his locks of hair and sighed. I heard someone humming near me and my friends. I whipped my head around to see an older man with a long beard humming a tune to a song.

I immediately recognized it to be "My Heart Will Go On" by Celine Dion. I began to sing the words to the song as the man hummed it. He looked straight at me as if he could actually see me and hummed the exact parts as I sang them. He chuckled and smiled at me.

"C-can you see me?" I asked confused. He nodded. Then he looked at James and said, "You boy, he's here ya know." The man had a gentle and wise voice. James gave him a small smile.

I looked at the old man. "Can you tell him something for me..." I asked timidly. He nodded his head yes. "Tell him that I love him and if I don't make it…I want him to have the best. I want him to move on and to have love and be loved."

The old man repeated this to James and James just looked at him as if he were crazy, but began to cry again. The old man frowned and pulled a few tissues from a box on the table and handed them to James. I floated over to James and tried to rub his back. His teeth started to chatter. "He says sorry about that…" the old man said looking sadly at James. "Wh-hat?" James asked. "He's sorry about making you shiver…his name is Kendall…am I right?"

**Narrator POV**

Doctors rushed and rushed thru the operating room. They had a life to save. Kendall Knight. They had to pump his stomach to get all of the pills out of his system. His heartbeat? Very slow. Would they succeed? It was a slim chance. Kendall Knight had made it hard for them. He had taken drugs and alcohol. What do you kids now-a-days call it? Cross fading? But why did Kendall Knight do this? To look cool? Guess again. He had done this to end his life. To not have to suffer everyday because he needed James Diamond and couldn't have him. But now he could even touch James. He couldn't reach out and stoke his golden tresses. He couldn't have a silly conversation about hockey with him. James couldn't even see him.

**Kendall Ghost POV**

James had the most shocked look on his face. "H-how'd you know?" he asked shakily.

"He told me, he's right next to ya. Reach your hand out and you'll see how cold it is."

James slowly reached his hand toward me and pulled it back quickly when he felt the coldness surrounding me. "I believe you…" James said calmly. The waiting room and hospital started to fade and I felt myself going thru some sort of wind tunnel. "NO! I NEED TO STAY!" I yelled as I was sucked out of the hospital.

**James POV**

Maybe that old man was crazy. Maybe I was. I saw a doctor walking toward the waiting room. My heart started beating so loud that I thought it was gonna burst out of my chest. The doctor stopped at the waiting room and said, "Mr. Diamond." I looked around stupidly as if there was another Mr. Diamond there. I saw the expression on the old man's face. He looked completely different than a few moments ago. He looked sad. I looked at the doctor and gulped. "Yes?"

"Come with me please."

He took me to a white room with a two black small couches and a rugged old desk. "Please, have a seat." I started to hyperventilate. He put his hand on my wrist. "James, it pains me to tell you this. Kendall had ingested too many pills and it was too late. I'm sorry, Kendall passed."

I lost it and broke down. "No…no…no!" I felt myself die inside. I felt empty, like a part of me just vanished. I sank to my knees and cried loudly. "Why can't you bring him back to me!" I yelled at the doctor, grabbing his shirt.

He pulled me up to standing position and said very calmly, "We did all we can Mr. Diamond. I'm so sorry…would you like to see him?" I nodded and the doctor led me to yet another room. I walked slowly into the room and saw Kendall. Pale as ever, lifeless. Tears poured out of my ears and I wiped them quickly. I felt my heart flutter. I thought I had seen some pretty terrible things in my life, but nothing compares to seeing someone you love so feeble and weak, so hopeless…

…_But I'd rather go on hearing your lies  
Than go on living without you._

**A/N: Sorry for not updating sooner, school's been hectic! I know this is very sad but I am going somewhere with this…so keep reading :] I hope you liked this chapter and I hope that you please review. I have a few new one shots that I'm going to be posting hopefully soon. BTW Champagne Diamond I'm not trying to copy you with the ghost thing haha it was purely a coincidence! Also please check out my little sister's and my older sister's stories! The links to their pages are on my profile. I would really appreciate it if you checked it out! Thank you to everyone who has reviewed my story! It makes me soo happy so **_**PLEASE REVIEW**_**! :]**


	13. The Unexpected :O

**James POV**

My heart swelled. I couldn't believe this. It was sickening. What had I done to deserve this…what had Kendall done? "You may have a few minutes with him…I'll leave." The doctor said his own eyes looking watery. I nodded as he walked out of the room and gently closed the door. I reached out my hand out to touch Kendall. I stroked his hair, feeling how cold he was. "I did this to you Kendall…I'm so sorry…"

**Logan POV**

Carlos and I sat in the waiting room nervously waiting for James to come back. Carlos' head was in my lap and he gently sobbed as I stroked his head. Just then the doctor came back into the waiting room and motioned for Carlos and me to follow him. I suddenly got a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. As we both got up and followed the doctor, Carlos squeezed my hand and looked worried. We went into a cozy, yet creepy white room with couches and a desk. I knew about this room. It was the room where they took you to tell you the bad news. I felt a tear slip down my cheek as I sat down with Carlos on the white sofa. The doctor looked at as with sadness in his eyes. "I am very sorry boys. Your friend did not make it." Carlos slipped his face into his hands and cried into them. I looked up at the ceiling and bit my lip as the tear poured out of my eyes. I looked at the doctor. "D-does his mother know?" I choked out. "The woman and the man that you came with have been trying to reach her. She hasn't picked up."

"We have to get a hold of her." Carlos whispered.

**Carlos POV**

I had lost a friend, Mrs. Knight a son, Katie Knight a brother. It broke my heart. Katie would never have her brother, someone she had loved so much, even though she may not have showed it much lately. She had once told me something that I never will forget…

_Flashback_

…_I was sitting by the pool on one of the loungers just chillin. Suddenly I heard a girly voice say, "Hey Carlos!" I look up to see 10 year old Katie Knight smiling at me with a tooth missing. "Oh my gosh did you run into a wall! Katie you know you can use my helmet whenever you want…"_

_She cut me off. "Nooo Carlos! My loose tooth finally came out!" she giggled. "Have you seen Kendall I needa show him!"_

"_Katie Knight this is so unlike you!" I told her giggling._

_She punched me in the arm. "Well he's my big brother and I love that boy! He told me when it comes out that he would take me out for ice cream!" I smiled._

"_Aw how cute!"_

"_You know Carlos, Kendall is the best brother anyone could ever have. I mean yeah sometimes I wanna throw a hockey puck at his head, but without him I don't know what I would do…he's just like so cool and I look up to him." I smiled and pulled Katie into a hug. "That's so sweet Katie." She pulled out of the hug and smiled. "Don't tell him I said any of that though." She said giggling. "I promise…"_

_End Flashback_

I cried even more because of this. That poor little girl had lost her everything. Her brother that's he loved so much. I pulled my phone out and dialed Mrs. Knight's number. It just rang and rang and then I heard her voicemail.

**Kendall's Ghost POV**

I hit something with a loud thud, but oddly I didn't feel the impact. I found myself in a giant white room. Suddenly a image appeared on the wall. It looked as if a projector was projecting it on the wall. It was a hospital and I saw my mother youthful looking on a hospital bed holding a baby in a bundle of blankets. A nurse walked up to her and asked, "Aw, he's darling. What's his name?" My mother gave her a warm smile. "Kendall. Kendall Francis Knight." Suddenly the image faded and other images quickly flashed on the screen. My first steps. Meeting James, Carlos and Logan. Katie being born. The band getting together. James and I's first kiss. Then something I hadn't seen yet. A gravestone with my name carved on it. My friends and family crying, all dressed in black. "NO!" I screamed. "That….it can't happen." I wanted to cry. But something in this room didn't allow me too. Without warning the walls of the room began to crack and the floor caved in and I was sent spiraling into darkness.

**James POV**

"I'm so so sorry!" I hugged the cold body. His coldness raised goose bumps on my skin. I didn't want to ever let him go. I put a small kiss on his lips. I still was hugging him and I whispered in his ear, "I love you. I always have. I hope you're safe with God. I wish I could hold you in my arms forever and never have to let you go. You mean the world to me…my endless love." I felt a sob shake throughout my body and my tear landed on Kendall's cheek. I wiped it away. His cold body had strangely turned warmer. I know I had been embracing him, but his whole face was now a warmer body temperature. I put my head on his chest and heard a slow heart beat that would rise then slowly fade. "DOCTOR!" I screamed.

**A/N: Yeahh I know it's short but I had two reviews for the last chapter, so I had no influence for this chapter. But hopefully it's still good and I hope you like it! PLEASE REVIEW IF YOU WANT LONGER CHAPTERS!**

**REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW! THANKS! GRACIAS! :]**


	14. Kendall and Carlos

**Logan POV**

Carlos was pacing around the room mumbling stuff to himself. It was making me nervous, so I grabbed his wrist and gave him a look. He sat down and opened his mouth to say something to the doctor, when we heard James yell.

**James POV**

I kept yelling for the doctor to come for about a minute straight. I rushed back over to Kendall, and saw that his mouth had opened slightly. He still had hope. "Come on baby. Come back." I said as I stroked his hair and held his hand. The doctor came rushing into the room with a frightened look on his face.

"What. What happened?"

"He has a h-heartbeat!" I said wiping tears from my face with my free hand. The doctor ordered me to get out of the way so I stepped out of his way and let go of Kendall's hand. The doctor listened to Kendall's heart with a stethoscope and his brows furrowed.

"Son, I don't hear anything…"

"W-what?"

"Maybe you just were imagining things, but—" I cut him off.

"No. I _know _what I heard! He even felt hot and he opened his mouth a little!" I yelled as angry tears rolled down my face. I went over to Kendall and put my head on his chest. For a moment I didn't hear anything, but slowly but surely I started to hear his heart beat. It was soft and quiet but it was still there. "_I_ can hear it." I said softly. I felt something cold near my face as the doctor put the stethoscope on Kendall's chest near my head. The doctor's eyes widened.

"This is…just bizarre! It seems as though every time you as close to him…his heart starts up again."

"C-can you save him?"

"It is possible…I think we may be able to use the defibrillators to bring him back. Just one thing."

"What is it doc?"

"You are going to have to start his heart up for us, and then quickly detach yourself from him so that we can shock him back."

I cringed at the idea of seeing Kendall shocked back to life. It was something I'm sure would never be erased from my mind. I suddenly felt a hand on my shoulder. "You don't have to look." I gulped and nodded my head. "Anything for him."

**Carlos POV**

"I can't take it Logan. What if something worse happened to Kendall, or what if James is going crazy!" I said as Logan and I walked back to the waiting room. Logan stopped me and put each hand on each of my shoulders.

"Carlos. Nothing worse can happen to Kendall. If James called the doctor, then I'm guessing something good happened."

"But Logie—"

"Shhhh," he said putting a finger on my mouth, "Everything will be fine baby. Just calm down." He moved the finger and kissed me lightly on the lips. "Okay?" I nodded. "I wonder if Gustavo and Kelly are still in the car…should I tell them?" My voice cracked on the last word and a tear rolled down my cheek. Logan sat down on one of the chairs in the waiting room and pulled me onto his lap. He rubbed my back and sang to me in a whispered voice. _"Don't worry about a thing…cuz every little thing…is gonna be alright."_

I sniffed and looked at him and he gave me a small smile. I could see his eyes were filled to the brim with tears, and suddenly one escaped and slid down his cheek. We hugged each other tightly , just sitting there not saying anything for a while. Suddenly I broke the silence.

"Logan…"

"Yeah?"

"Will you promise me something?"

"What is it Carlitos?"

"Promise me..that.." I could feel my throat getting thick with tears. "If we ever…break up or h-have p-problems…" I felt dozens of tears flood my eyes. "…never…ever do anything crazy." He looked up at me and tears were pouring out of his eyes.

"I-I p-promise." He whispered. "I love you too much… to see you get hurt."

"I love you too Logan. Seriously."

**James POV**

The doctor had told me to stay off of Kendall while he got his plan set up with other doctors. But, of course I didn't listen and held Kendall in my arms. I whispered dozens of things to Kendall as if he could hear me. "…We'll be together again soon Kenny." I suddenly heard someone take in a sharp breath of air, I looked up and saw that it was Kendall. The doctor had put a heart monitor back on Kendall, so I looked up at it and saw that it was starting to go up. I kissed his wrist and smiled, I would soon have Kendall back with me. Then the heart monitor started to go crazy and Kendall's eyes shot open and he screamed.

**Logan POV**

Gustavo and Kelly finally came back into the hospital looking miserable as ever. "H-how is he?" Kelly asked, her mascara smeared all over her face.

"Kelly. He's…gone."

"W-what!" She said in a high pitch voice as she began to sob and hugged Gustavo. He looked down at us and saw Carlos sitting on my lap .

"How James taking it?" he asked quietly. He had figured us out. I saw a tear slip down his face.

"N-not good. But earlier, he called the doctor int-t-o the room, s-so we don't know what's going on-n right now…"

"S-so h-he migh-t-t-t still be okay!" Kelly said smearing her makeup all over her face as she wiped the tears away.

"We hope so." Carlos whispered.

**James POV**

"WHERE AM I! WHAT'S HAPPENING!" Kendall screamed as he tried to pull the cords attached to him. He looked over to me. "JAMES! HELP ME!" he sounded scared, like a lost little boy. "Kendall, I'm right here…don't worry…" I hugged him and rubbed his back and kissed the top of his head. "J-James I'm scared." He sobbed . His fear made me cry. "K-kendall, I won't let them hurt you…I'm so glad your okay…I love you." It was the first time I had ever said it to him. It felt so right though. I did love him.

**Kendall Ghost POV**

I felt myself falling at an extreme speed. It was so fast that my eyes were watering. Suddenly I landed and it felt as though I was pushed into something, and I no longer felt light, I felt whole and heavy. The experience itself was frightening. Unfamiliar.

**Kendall POV**

My eyes shot open and I was connected to a whole bunch of machines. I immediately freaked out. "WHERE AM I! WHAT'S HAPPENING!" I saw James looking at me frightened. "JAMES! HELP ME!" He started to talk to me and softly and kissed me on the head. The last thing that I remembered was getting into a fight with James. How long ago was that? An hour, a day, a week? I couldn't remember. But then James told me something, and it filled my heart with a joy for just a moment. "I love you." Just those three little words. But then I realized that I was practically tied to a hospital bed with a whole bunch of cords.

**James POV**

Kendall had taken a while to respond and just as I was about to open my mouth to say something, he started crying. "James, please go… you made your decision and you don't have to change it because you feel bad for me."

"No Kendall…I love you! I don't even care about what happened with Jo, we could just try again." We were so caught up in each other that we didn't realize that a whole bunch of doctors had just rushed in. Shocked faces filled the room.

"H-how'd you do it?" one doctor asked. The main doctor motioned for everyone but Kendall and I to leave. The doctor looked at as questionably. "How— What?"

"I have no idea, I just was holding him and he came back to life." I said flatly.

The doctor raised an eyebrow and then his face softened. "This has only happened once before…but it was with a newborn baby…Mr. Knight, I'm going to have to check a few things. Mr. Diamond you are welcome to stay.

"Wait…can I talk to James for a second?" Kendall asked exhaustedly.

"Of course." He said as he left the room. Once the door was shut, Kendall quickly turned to look at me.

"James, you know I love you, but I don't want to hurt you."

"Kendall. You never hurt me…Jo did." My face flooded with tears as the memory came back.

"But I could've punched her in the face or pushed her off sooner. I didn't want anyone but you to kiss me. And she ruined it. I'm sorry." There was a silence.

"Do you know that I found you laying lifelessly in the apartment…It killed me inside Kendall and if you're gonna just break up with me again, then might as well get a gun and shoot me because I could not feel anymore dead."

"I just want what's best for you— "

"You're what's best for me Kendall! Don't you get that!"

He started crying and I went over to him and wrapped my arms around him. He did the same and said, "James, I love you and I'm sorry for all this trouble I've been causing you."  
I pulled back from the hug and stared into his emerald green eyes."If it wasn't for you, then it wouldn't be worth it."

Suddenly there was a knock on the door and the doctor came in. He did a whole bunch of tests to confirm that Kendall was okay. He turned out to be just fine, but he had to be in the hospital a few weeks on suicide watch.

*A few weeks later*

**Narrator POV**

Kendall was back and everything was beginning to go back to normal. When Mrs. Knight found out about Kendall she had nearly had a heart attack and Katie had fainted. They both seemed cautious around Kendall now, trying not to make him sad or provoke him. Mrs. Knight, Gustavo and Kelly all knew about all of them being gay and they were all fine with it. Life was just getting better for all of them.

**Carlos POV**

_The coldness enveloped me. I was standing on a rain soaked street and in front of me was a body. The body of Logan Mitchell. "I had to do it Carlos, I couldn't stand to see you with Stephanie." He had jumped in front of the car I was just driving. "No, no Logan! You promised!" Then his head fell back and his body went limp and a trail of blood poured out of his mouth._

"LOGAN!" I screamed and woke myself up in the process. I was breathing heavy and my pajamas were sticking to me. "I-it was j-just a dream." I heard someone get out of the bed next to mine and come and stand by my bed.

"What's wrong Carlitos?" I heard the concern in Logan's voice.

"B-bad dream."

"Again?" Logan asked sadly.

"C-can you sleep with me?" I asked with a knot in my throat.

"Of course." He slid in next to me and we were face to face. I kissed him on the nose.

"Thank you Logie."

"Anything for you baby."

**Logan POV**

I snuggled up into Carlos and he put his head in the crook of my neck. His nightmares had been going on ever since Kendall had tried to suicide. I was scared for Carlos. He was so innocent and his nightmares were filled with violent stuff happening to me. I could see it every day in his eyes. Fear. Fear of ever losing me. I kissed him on the head and sang him to sleep and soon he was snoring peacefully.

**A/N: I hope you liked this chapter. I've been overloaded with homework so I haven't had a chance to post. Thank you sooo much for all the reviews on the last chapter. Hopefully I could gets lots on this chapter too. Soo…**

_**PLEASE REVIEW!**_


	15. Nightmare

**A/N: Oh my goodness! That new Big Time Rush episode was amaaaazing! Don't you agree? And I loved the music video. That part where Carlos ran and hid just cracked me up! :] Such a silly boy haha anyways pleassee enjoy this next chapter. (Forgot to mention this for the last chapter. I got the idea of James bringing Kendall back to life from this news article I read about a mother bring back her newborn baby. So touching. )**

**Carlos POV**

I woke up the next morning with my head on Logan's chest as he held me close to his body. I looked up at him, he was still asleep. His chest slowly rose and fell, he was so peaceful…so beautiful to look at. You may think that I have it good right now, but I don't. Just as my life was starting to get better, I started having these terrible nightmares about my Logie. Something terrible would always happen to him and it always seemed so real, like I couldn't wake up and see his beautiful face.

I adjusted myself so that I was at face level with him and kissed him on the lips. His eyebrow twitched. I giggled. Little things about him were so cute, and that's what made me love him. I kissed his weak spot on his neck and he made a noise in his sleep. Then suddenly he pounced on top of me. At first I was shocked, because I thought he was asleep, but apparently he wasn't. Then I started laughing.

"You like messing with me!" Logan said playfully as he kissed my nose.

"I like doing lots of stuff with you sugadaddy!" I said raising my eyebrows suggestively. He blushed, and giggled as he got up and stretched. I got up as well and looked at the clock. 6:05 am.

**Kendall POV**

One of the great things about James is the fact that whenever I'm with him, I feel safe. I inhaled the smell of his Cuda body wash that clung to his body. I was laying with my face on his washboard abs; we had fallen asleep like that. We had talked a lot last night. Nothing serious. Just lovey dovey stuff and funny stuff that had happened the day before. I could spend an eternity just having conversations like that with my James. _**My**_ James. Wow that feels good to say.

"My James."

"What?" asked a sleepy voice.

I chuckled. "Nothing babe." I looked at the clock. 6:10 am. "We should get up, we have rehearsal today."

"Dammit. I'm tired." James whined. I reached up to his face and kissed both of his eyes. "Wake up sleepyhead!"

"_Ken_dall!" James whined.

"_Ja_mes!" I mimicked laughing. He smiled at me. "Hey, we should take a shower together." I said knowing that he would get up.

He quickly got up and stretched. "I'm awake, let's go take a shower."

I laughed. "Oh, James."

**Logan POV**

After we had all gotten dressed and ready and had gotten James and Kendall out of the shower, we were taken to Rocque Records.

"Good Morning Dogs, I had a rough night last night, and I have to have a meeting with Griffin today, so I can't stay for rehearsals. Kelly is gonna practice with you guys today, so _please_ behave." Gustavo said sleepily. He yawned and walked out of the building.

"Alright guys, we have to do harmonies today. James, Kendall read the top part of the lyrics. Logan, Carlos the bottom." Kelly said sweetly.

We started to sing, making sure to harmonize perfectly. Suddenly Carlos, stopped and I looked at him. His face was horrorstricken and pale and he had his hand on his chest. "Carlos, are you okay?" I asked scared.

**Carlos POV**

Today felt like it was going to be a good day. Gustavo was gone, we were doing harmonies, and I got to sing with my main squeeze. I thought it would all be good. But when I was singing, I started seeing nightmares flash through my mind, and not just the old ones, new nightmares that I had never witnessed. I saw my Logie being torn apart in my mind. I felt like I couldn't breathe. Logan said something to me that I didn't quite understand. "I-I need to get some fresh air for a sec, Kelly do you mind?"

"No, sweetie, I don't mind go right ahead." She said sounded concerned

I walked quickly out of the sound booth and went to the restroom. I locked it and looked at myself in the mirror. I was pale and was breaking out in a cold sweat. I felt as if I couldn't breathe and my fingers gripped the sink tightly. I decided to splash some cold water on my face. My breathing became a little more normal. "Okay, chill Carlos…" I told myself. I looked up back at the mirror in which now I saw was covered in blood and saw a reflection of Logan hanging in the background. I screamed and fell backwards onto the floor sobbing. "What's happening to me?" I whispered. I heard knocking on the door and the voices of my friends muffled through the door.

"Baby, what's the matter?"-Logan

"Carlos, are you okay?"-Kendall

"Dude, what's wrong?"-James

I scampered up to my feet and unlocked the door with shaky hands.

**James POV**

Carlos did not look well. He was shaking uncontrollably and crying. His naturally tan face was a pale yellow color and he looked as if he had seen a ghost.

"I-I s-s-saw L-Log-gan h-angin-gg-ing!"He sobbed as he lost his balance, luckily we all caught him. Logan ran a hand through his hair looking worried. Kendall looked at Logan questionably.

"Later." Logan mouthed. All of us helped Carlos get to a chair. He was still shaking like a scared little boy. Logan bent down so that he was face level with Carlos. He held Carlos's face in his hand and whispered soothingly to him. "My nightmares Logan…t-there n-not just when I'm a-s-sleep." Carlos stuttered. He looked at Logan, confusion and innocence filled Carlos's face. "I don't know what's happening to me…"

**Kendall POV**

I didn't understand any of this. What was wrong with poor Carlos? He was usually so full of happiness and energy. It hurt me to see one of my closest friends, so weak and scared. Logan seemed as if he knew what was going on. I went over to him and whispered to him if we could talk in private. He looked at Carlos who looked like a lost little boy. "I'll be right back Carlitos." Carlos nodded.

Logan and I stepped into Gustavo's office to talk. Just then Logan burst out into tears. "I don't know what to do for him! This is my entire fault!"

"What's wrong Logan?" I was now scared.

"Carlos…he's been having nightmares…about…me…c-com-," he gulped. "Committing suicide."

This was not Logan's fault one bit. It was mine. All mine. I couldn't speak my throat was too dry. So I just stood there giving Logan a sorry look as a single tear ran down my cheek. All of were breaking apart, piece by piece we were being destroyed.

**Carlos POV**

I was biting my nails nervously. James was sitting staring at me. "Carlos…what's…what's wrong?"

I looked up at him cautiously. Luckily he didn't look like he thought I was crazy. "I just …James…I've been having nightmares about Logan…killing himself…it's been happening every since…well you know," I felt the tears threatening to spill out of my eyes. "And just recently…well today…I'm having those nightmares…while being awake." I said shakily.

James mouth was open slightly in shock. "I'm…sorry Carlos…t-that's t-terrible…"

I nodded. "I would never, ever want to lose Logan. L-life without that boy, it just wouldn't be worth living. He is the sunshine to my day. I look forward to waking up to his gentle face…just one look at him used to make all my troubles go away…now it's starting to remind me of all my troubles…"

**A/N: I just quickly wrote this up, so sorry if it's not that good. I kinda like it so hopefully you will. I didn't get a whole lot of reviews last chapter. It's kind of like a pattern, if I get a lot of reviews, then I write a good chapter and vice versa! :] Well anyways I hope you enjoyed this chapter!**

**Quote of the chapter: Carlos:"She's gonna kill us!" **

**Logan: (in a deep voice)"Not if we kill her first!"**

_**PLEASE REVIEW!**_


	16. Sex and Confessions!

**Logan POV**

"Why don't you guys just take a day off…if Gustavo asks tell him we practiced…okay?" Kelly said looking at Carlos concerned. "Yeah, thanks Kelly…" Kendall said looking at the floor. We all said goodbye to Kelly and were driven back to the Palmwoods. I held Carlos' hand in the limo. He looked at me with a mix of sadness and fear in his eyes.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" I asked lifting his chin with my finger.

He hesitated but then shook his head no, "Later." He put his head on my shoulder.

When we arrived at the Palmwoods, and were in the apartment, I knew I had to talk to Carlos. He couldn't just keep this bottled up. I instantly led him to the room we shared and sat down on the bed with him. "Carlos, what exactly is happening?" I asked him concerned.

His bottom lip quivered and he quietly said, "I-I don't know…I think I'm going crazy."

"Carlos, baby, you are not crazy! There has to be a possible explanation for this, now just tell me what's…um…happening in these…dreams…" I didn't want to ask, but I had to find out what was wrong with my baby.

He swallowed loudly and licked his lips, "Well…um every night, I have these nightmares about you…committing suicide a-a-and…" He whimpered and a tear slid down his cheek. "I keep…having like hallucinations of you…k-killing yourself." He put his head in his hands and started to breathe heavy.

I pulled him into my lap. "Aw, it's gonna be okay baby, I'm right here, and I always will be. I love you Carlos." He wrapped his arms around me and whispered, "I love you too."

I kissed his cheek. "I'm going to fix all of this Carlos, I don't like seeing you so scared...it just breaks my heart." He hiccupped from crying so much and giggled at himself. After a few minutes he fell asleep in my lap. I swear he is like a big baby, he falls asleep so easily. I laid him down on his bed and put some covers over him. Hopefully, he wouldn't have a bad dream.

I grabbed my laptop out from under my bed and flipped it open. I searched for "suicide dreams" on Google. I clicked on the first website. I looked at the meaning and understood the problem almost immediately.

_***Suicide Dream Meaning**_

_**Psychological Meaning:**__ You are turning your feelings of aggression against yourself. Perhaps you are unable to overcome feelings of guilt or feel degradation and helplessness. You may feel unable to cope with a problem that has troubled you for some time. Part of you is crying out for help. I suggest that you talk over your problems with someone you can trust. A problem shared is a problem halved._

Carlos was carrying the guilt of hiding our relationship. I was the problem. Maybe we needed to come out about this. Or at least tell our parents. I know it would be tough. Carlos' dad was a pretty macho guy, and the last time he thought Carlos was gay, I could tell he was going to explode. But, Carlos had lied to him and told him that he wasn't, and that he liked girls a lot. How was his dad going to take it? How was Carlos going to handle telling him? I sighed.

**Carlos POV**

The last thing I remember was sitting on Logan's lap and drifting off into a much needed sleep. I was now in a dark room. I couldn't see a thing…it sort of reminded me of my near death experience. I started to freak out, then I heard Logan's voice. "Carlos!"

"Logan! Where are you? It's dark in here!"

"Carlos help! I can't take it anymore! AHH!" I heard a loud bang and Logan screamed in pain.

"LOGAN! what's wrong! What's happening to you!" I suddenly felt myself being shook and opened my eyes to my room and Logan standing above me scared. I realized that I was sweating and my chest was heaving up and down. It had happened again, those fucking nightmares were going to haunt me forever. This time, I didn't cry. I was too frustrated to. "I am so sick of these fucking nightmares!" I said gripping my hair angrily.

"Carlos, calm down! I-"

"NO! I will not fucking calm down! I can't! I-I'm going fucking psycho!" and then the tears started flowing. Logan, being the sweet guy that he is, rubbed my back and said, "You're not psycho Carlos, and I'm sorry for telling you to calm down."

"D-don't be sorry, I'm sorry."

He pressed his lips to my head and in a muffled voice said, "I think I know how to stop these nightmares."

"You do!" I said happily.

"Yes…"

"Well, tell me!"

"We have to come out to our parents."

**James POV**

Logan had told us not to worry about Carlos, he was taking care of him and everything would be alright. He had also asked us to get out of the apartment because he wanted to talk to Carlos privately. Me, having a dirty mind, of course thought he was talking about getting it on with Carlos. He hit me when I said that and told me to go do something with Kendall.

So, as Kendall and I exited the apartment I tried to hold his hand but he didn't let me. I looked at him confused. "Babe, you know we can't let people see us holding hands." He said sadly.

"Oh…yeah, well I hate that. I wanna be able to hold your hand, kiss you, lay my head on your shoulder, in public!"

"Don't you think I do too! I hate seeing girls all over you. 'James, this and James that. OH James! You're soooo muscular!'" Kendall imitated a female voice. I laughed.

"Kendall, you know I don't care about those girls at all. I don't even remember their names. The only person that I am truly in love with is you, and that's never gonna change."

He smiled and hugged me, "I love you too James."

When we stopped hugging, I smiled and he blushed. "You're too cute Kendall."

We walked to the elevator fighting the urge to reach out and entwine our fingers.

We decided to go to the beach. It was where we had had our first "date". I remember that day like it was yesterday. It always brought a smile to my face…I always tried to remember the good times that I've shared with Kendall, but every now and then, I'll have a flashback. It is never good. I see Kendall, pale and lifeless lying on a hospital bed and me knowing I can't do anything about it. I try to shake it from my head. Sometimes it works, other times…well it won't leave my mind.

I had one of these flashbacks while driving. I can tell that Kendall knew something was wrong, but I didn't want to worry him so I tried to keep it together. "James, baby. What's wrong, you're pale as a ghost." Bad choice of words Kendall. I suddenly pulled over and got out of the car. I put my hands over my face and felt that I was crying. Little words such as pale and ghost had triggered this. Kendall got out of the car and grabbed my shoulders and looked at me straight in the eye. His own emerald eyes full of worry and confusion. "James, what's wrong? Did I say something wrong?"

I just hugged him tightly and let little silent tears roll down my cheek. "Yeah…you said p-pale, and ghost."

I could tell Kendall didn't understand at first but then something clicked in his brain. "Oh James, I'm sorry. Don't worry I'm right here. I'll never do something like that ever again." He hugged me tighter and whispered things like "its okay." And "I love you baby, I'm right here."

Finally I said, "Let's get back in the car, I'm sorry for all of this."

"You have nothing to be sorry about Jamiebear."

I smiled at my nickname and got back in the car to drive to the beach.

**Carlos POV**

"WHAT! No. No I'm too scared! What if my dad hits me or I don't know!" I started to quickly pace.

"Carlos, don't worry! It will all be fine! I'll make sure he doesn't hurt you. And why would he? He's your dad and he loves you very much."

"B-but what if he flips out! Logan, I don't know if we should tell our parents…I just don't think it would solve anything."

"Carlos."

"Yeah?"

"Do you trust me?

"Yeah...but—"

"_Do you trust me?"_

"Yes, yes I do." I said closing my eyes and sighing. I knew that one day I would have to tell my dad. He just scared the shit out of me.

**Kendall POV**

James and I laid on the warm sand just looking up at the clear sunny sky. Luckily no one was at the beach, so James and I could have our privacy. I wanted to ask James something but I was too embarrassed. James and I had never…well um…did it. And I hoped that maybe someday we actually could…and I was hoping that that day was today.

"Um J-James?"

"Yeah Kendall." He said smiling, those beautiful hazel eyes staring into my soul.

"I-uh…" I thought that I should just go for it...the worst that could happen was that he would tell me to stop.

I climbed on top of him and kissed him roughly on the lips. He responded by kissing me back and running a hand through my hair. I started to unbutton his shirt and he pulled away. "Woah, Kendall…what are you doing?"

I immediately turned bright red and felt embarrassed tears in my eyes. "UH-I-uh well I just thought," I cleared my throat, "if you don't want to its fine…" I started to get up because I didn't want James to see the embarrassment all over my face. But he grabbed my arm and pulled me back down. He saw my eyes tearing from being embarrassed. I wiped them on the back of my sleeve. "James, w-we should like g-go or something."

"Kendall."

"What?"

"I want to."

"You want to go?

"No, I want you." He pushed me against the sand and kissed me passionately. I felt his hand go up my shirt and I shuddered. I knew that he wanted it.

**Carlos POV**

I held my cell phone in my trembling hand and gulped.

"Carlos, its okay I'll be here the whole time."

I smiled weakly, "I got this Logan; I'll be fine."

I dialed my dad's phone number and waited as it rang.

*ring*

*ring*

*ring*

"Hello?" a deep husky voice answered.

"Papi? It's Carlos."

"Hey! How's my boy doing?"

"Good, good dad, um I have to tell you something…" My heart was pounding out of my chest by now.

"Son…what's wrong? Did something happen?"

"No, nothing happened. I've been keeping a secret from you and I-I really need to tell you. It's kinda big…"

"Carlos…just tell me."

I took a deep breath and told him, "I'm gay."

"Woah, did I hear you right? Because I could've sworn I just heard you say you were fucking gay!"

"No, you _**FUCKING**_ heard me right!"

"HEY! You watch your language with me!"

"Why should I respect someone like you, who fucking discriminates!"

"You don't fucking talk to me like that! I raised your ass in a nice home, I provided for your ungrateful ass and now you give me this shit! You disappoint me you fucking faggot!"

"_I _disappoint _you_! You disappoint me! You don't even love me enough to accept who I am! All you ever wanted from me was my fucking money!"

"That's not true!"

"Isn't it? I haven't talked to you in who knows how long, and I've been sending you money every month! You haven't even called once to see how I was! And I've been with Logan for almost a whole year now and of course you wouldn't know, because you don't care enough to call!"

"Logan? Logan Mitchell?"

"Yes, Logan Mitchell. I love him more than anyone in this whole world. He cares about me, unlike you. And, he's great at making love." Logan stared at me with wide eyes.

"I-i can't believe what I am hearing…you disappoint me Carlos." Then he hung up.

**A/N: Welllll, did you like it? It took me a while to decide what to write next, so I hope you liked it . :]**

**Tell me what you think of it in a review! I really appreciate when I get long reviews. **

**SO…**

_**PLEASE REVIEW!**_

**Quote of the Chapter:**

**Bitters**: We have to get rid of that ghost.

**Carlos**: Don't worry, we'll catch it _(pulls out green fishing net)_ tonight.

**Logan**: With a fishing net?

**Carlos**: An _ecto_ net.

**Logan**: Fishing net.

**Carlos**: _Ecto net!_

**Logan**: It's a fishing net.

**Carlos**: Ec-to net!

**Logan**: Fishing net.

**Carlos**: ECTO NET!

**Logan**: Oh, let's go fishing-

**Carlos**: NO FISHING, IT'S AN ECTO NET!

**Logan**: -WITH IT!


	17. I'll Follow You Until You Love Me

**A/N: Heyyy it's been a while! Sorry, I've been really busy and I didn't get a lot of reviews. If I continue to not get a lot of reviews, I'll just end the story. I won't post another chapter and just leave it as it is. So please review! **

**On a happier note, JAMES MASLOW SENT ME A TWEET ON TWITTER! :D haha it was amazing! Also, that new Big Time Rush episode was pretty cool, but it confused me haha. Anyways on with the story! Enjoy!**

**Kendall POV**

"Kendall." James lay on my chest looking up at me with his gorgeous hazel eyes. I looked down at the lovely boy and smiled.

"Yeah James."

"I couldn't have imagined that moment to be anymore special. I love you."

"I love you too Jamsie." I had the biggest smile on my face at I stroked his hair. It had been James' "first time" and it had been with me. I couldn't have felt any happier than I did right now with James by my side. I sighed a happy sigh and looked up at the light clouds drifting across the sky. I'm glad that I was here, alive, able to share this moment with James.

**Logan POV**

Carlos hung up the phone looking amused but angry at the same time. I was a little angry because he had told his father that I was "great at making love."

"Man, my dad is just so stupid, just so ignorant!" Carlos said running a hand through his hair. "Can't he just understand that I Iove you!"

I smiled lightly at him. "Carlos, it's just hard for him…and you didn't need to tell him that last part!" I said my cheeks turning a pink color.

Carlos got a big grin on his face, "Oh, yeah the sex part," he laughed his adorable mocking laugh, "I just thought that'd raise his blood pressure a bit. But, hey Logan at least I didn't lie, you sure can—"

I cut him off "Stop! I get it!" my face was pretty much red by now.

He chuckled and kissed my cheek, "You still need to call your parents." He said seriously.

I gulped. "Oh y-yeah…I'm scared." I took a deep breath and put my head in my hands.

Carlos rubbed my back. "Don't be scared baby, I'll be right here. And your parents will probably accept you for who you are, don't worry they love you."

I looked up at Carlos and gave him a shy smile. "Give me the phone." I whispered.

_*ring*_

_*ring*_

_*ring*_

"Hello!" my mother's pleasant voice answered the phone.

"Mom! It's me, Logan!" I said cheerfully.

"Aww sweetheart, how are you! I was just thinking about you while baking some muffins!"

I chuckled, "I'm great mom, actually really great! I actually called b-because I wanted to t-tell you something." I gulped. I looked at Carlos nervously and he gave me a reassuring smile.

"What is it sweetie?" she sounded a bit more concerned.

"M-mom…I...I…I'm gay."

I expected an awkward silence or for my mom to start yelling but it didn't come. "Oh, sweetie! I totally support you! You sounded so worried; I thought it was something bad!"

A big smile appeared on my face and I saw Carlos' face light up out of the corner of my eye. "I really appreciate you saying that Mom."

"Honey, I'll always love and accept you. No matter who you fall in love with. Now, who's the lucky guy?"

"Well, mom I'm the lucky one. It's Carlos, you know Carlos Garcia."

"Oooh honey, you are lucky. You got yourself a Latino boy!"

Carlos obviously heard, because he started cracking up.

"Oh mom!" I blushed and looked down at my feet.

She laughed. "Honey, I wish only the best for you and Carlos. I love you. Talk to you soon."

"Thanks mom, I love you too. Bye."

I ended the call and looked at Carlos who had a smile so big that it lit up the room. "I love your mom." He said.

I laughed. "She is a pretty amazing woman."

"And she made such a sexy, hot man." Carlos said seductively as he started to make out with me. He started to pull up my shirt when we heard the door open and Mrs. Knight's voice. "Dammit!" Carlos mumbled as he took his hands off of me. I chuckled and patted his cheek.

"We'll do this later…" I said as I got up to go greet Mrs. Knight.

I walked into the kitchen to find her talking to Katie and putting down a whole bunch of shopping bags.

"… wasn't that cashier just so gorgeous!" Katie said dreamily. I laughed.

"Oh Katie, are you checking out guys that are too old for you again?"

"Well all you guys are gay! So I can't check you out!" she said smirking.

"Woah there Katie! You're my friend's little sister! You shouldn't be checking me out!" I chuckled.

"Well hey, you, Carlos, and James are all good looking!"

Carlos came out of our room smiling, "Why thank you Miss Katie Knight." He went over to Mrs. Knight and whispered something in her ear.

"Oh yeah, I did!" she said smiling at Carlos.

Katie and I both looked at her confused. "It's none of your business." She shot back at us.

**James POV**

I've experienced many things in my life. Some were good, some bad, but this experience beat them all. I looked over at Kendall and saw him staring up at the clouds. A single tear fell from his eye and I wiped it away.

"What's wrong Kenny?" I asked concerned.

"Nothing. Nothing at all. Everything is just how it should be…perfect."He looked at me lovingly and had a big smile on his face. "I love you James."

"I love you too." I smiled as I looked up at the sky and noticed that it had begun to lightly rain. "Should we get going?"

"Yeah, my mom's probably home by now…and I don't want her to get all worried." Kendall got up and helped me get up, and we walked back to the car hand-in-hand.

As I drove back to the Palm Woods, Kendall was quiet.

"James, I think I wanna come out."

My mind was on the road, so I didn't really get what he was saying. "Huh?"

"I want to tell the world…you know, about us being together."He reached over and grabbed my free hand.

I smiled. The thought of Kendall and I being able to show our love for each other in public gave me happy butterflies. The only places that we could ever show affection were in our room and that little private beach.

I didn't notice that I had been silent. "I-if you don't want to…then…its okay…" Kendall sounded like he was going to cry.

"No! Kendall, I've wanted to the whole time! I want the world to know that I am in love with Kendall Francis Knight and no one can ever change that!" I pulled up at the Palm woods and parked as I said this.

He now smiled and we both leaned in to kiss.

**Narrator's POV**

What Kendall and James both didn't see, was the paparazzi man that flashed a few pictures of them as they kissed. He hid in a bush and slowly approached the car to get a few closer pictures. James broke away from the kiss because he thought he saw a flash.

"What was that?" He said furrowing his eyebrows.

"What?" Kendall asked looking around.

"I saw…like a camera flash or something."

"Aw, man it's probably lightning! We should head up to the apartment."

James went in for one last kiss, which of course the paparazzi man caught, and Kendall and him walked into the Palm Woods as if they were just two best friends and nothing more.

When they reached the apartment, they found Carlos singing and playing his guitar as Logan pleaded him to tell him what he whispered to Mama Knight. Carlos stopped playing the guitar.

"Logan, for the one hundredth time! I'm not going to tell you!" he snickered and continued playing the guitar.

"Well here's a little secret for you Carlos!" Logan whispered something in his ear and then turned and started to walk into his bedroom.

"WHAT! Logan no! You promised earlier that we would!" Carlos dropped his guitar and followed Logan.

"EW!" Katie giggled. "There are some virgin ears in here that do not need to know about that!"

James chuckled, "What's all that about?" He asked as sat down by Katie on the couch.

"My mom and Carlos are now sharing secrets with each other, and Logan wants to know what Carlos told her."

"Dude, I swear Logan is so much like a girl! He has to know all the gossip!" Kendall said sitting by James and putting his arm around James' shoulders.

"Hey I heard that!" Logan said from the other room.

**Carlos POV**

Okay, so you're probably wondering what I whispered to Mrs. Knight, right? Well, I kinda, sorta planned a special date with Logan and Mama Knight was in on it. I had asked her if she had gotten it all planned for me. Earlier in the day I had asked her if she could please make some reservations for me at this fancy restaurant and if she could pick out a nice outfit for me while she was shopping. Mrs. Knight had great taste, so I trusted her. Back to the present…

"Why can't you tell me!" Logan plopped down on the bed and gave me puppy dog eyes.

He looked so cute so I kissed his forehead, "Because! It's a secret, and if I tell you, then it will ruin the secret."

"Man! If you weren't so adorably cute, then I would be mad at you!" Logan pretended to pout but couldn't help the smile that was appearing on his face.

I smiled, "Oh Logie, you can never be mad at me. You're too sweet." I ruffled his hair and walked toward the bathroom. "Imma go take a shower…wanna join me?" I smirked and Logan bit his lip trying to hold back a smile.

Finally he gave in, "Oh, dammit yes I do!" He followed me into the bathroom, the both of us giggling like little girls.

**Kendall POV**

I sat on the couch by James and Katie watching some fashion show that they liked.

"So…what'd you guys do when you were gone for_ sooo_ long?" Katie asked. She was up to something, I could tell by the tone of her voice.

"We just went to the beach…" James said his eyes not leaving the tv screen.

"And what did you do there?" she looked at me with an evil grin.

"Beach stuff."

"Nothing."

James and I said at the same time.

"Hmm, so you did beach stuff…and nothing?...Okay then." She smirked.

"Isn't it past your bed time?" I asked annoyed. She rolled her eyes and hit me in the back in the head as she got up and walked to her room. Once I was sure that she couldn't hear me, I turned to James.

"Is my sister like, psychic or something?"

"Dude, I almost gave in and told her!"

"Why would you tell my little sister about us having sex on the beach!"

"I didn't—"

"YOU DID WHAT ON THE BEACH?" I turned around to see my mother fuming with anger. She had her hands on her hips and a mad expression on her face.

"Ohhh shiiit!"

**A/N: Therrre you go! Yes, I know it was short, but you guys should've reviewed more! But I still hoped you liked it! I have some great stuff planned for the next chapter, so you better review this one if you want me to post the next chapter! :) **

_**REVIEW!**_

**Carlos**: _(dressed as a cop with a mustache)_ We gotta cut three more minutes short from the show to perform.

**Kendall**: _(dressed as a Abe Lincoln)_ Then "Operation: We Love Ed Begley Jr But We Have To Cut His Segment Short to Perform" is underway.

**Logan**: _(dressed as a pharaoh)_ Okay, next time I'm in charge of operation naming! _(gets slapped by James)_ Owww...what was that for?

**James**: _(dresses as a fisherman)_ Number eleven: Slap a pharaoh. Check.


	18. Promise?

**A/N: Hello peeps! **** Sorry I haven't posted for this story in like a while haha. I'm sick so let's hope that my sickness doesn't make this chapter suck haha. **** Anyways, ENJOY! **

**Kendall POV**

"H-hey mom!" I gulped.

"Kendall Francis Knight you got some explaining to do!" she gave me the scary evil eye look.

"Well, its past my bed time! So, I think I'm just gonna go—'' James tried to get off the couch and walk to our room but my mom stopped him.

"James David Diamond, you stay right where you are!"

"Damn." He mumbled under his breath.

"Care to explain?" she raised an eyebrow at us.

"Well, uh, I don't know how else to e-xp-lain, b-but James and I…" I was too nervous to tell my mom and I felt a cold sweat on my forehead.

"…Kendall and I love each other Mrs. Knight. And I'm sorry if this goes against your rules, I really am. So how long are we grounded?" James really knew what to say.

My mom sighed, "You didn't have to be secretive about it. I thought both my boys were still virgins."

"Mom! Did you just want us to go up to you and be like James and I had sex! And we were virgins…until earlier."

"Okay, okay I get it! Just don't do anything stupid. You have to be open with me sometimes, I'm your mother and I wouldn't want anything to happen to either of you." She pulled James and I into a hug and tiptoed to kiss our heads. "Now go get some rest. I love you boys."

"Thanks mom I love you too."

"Goodnight Mrs. Knight."

**James POV**

"That didn't go as bad as I thought it would." I said as Kendall and I were in our room. "I love your mom."

"Yeah, I'm glad." Kendall said as he climbed into bed with me. "You wanna, you know…"

"Kendall Francis Knight! Go to bed!" I turned the opposite direction from him and he laughed.

"I was only kidding Jamie!" he wrapped his arms around my waist. "Or maybe I wasn't." he whispered.

"Pervert." I said smiling as he chuckled.

**Carlos POV**

When Logie and I had finally gotten out of the shower, we went to our room and snuggled on the bed.

"Carlos."

"Yeah."

"I'll always love you."

A big smile lit up my face and I kissed Logan on the nose.

"I will always love you too. Forever."

We fell asleep our bodies entwined with one another.

**Katie POV**

I had heard Kendall and James' whole conversation with my mom. I was laughing my ass off at first, but then she got all soft on them. Dammit! Oh well time for bed.

** Logan POV **

We had rehearsal the next day, so I had to wake Carlos up. He was a heavy sleeper and he slept forever!

"Carlos, wake up." I shook him and he just groaned sleepily. "Carlos Roberto Garcia, GET UP!" once again he just kept snoring, so I thought up a devious little plan.

I ran to the bathroom and found a towel and soaked it in water, then I returned to our room.

"Oh Carlos, get up get up get up!" No response. "Okay then, you asked for it."

I squeezed all the water from towel onto his face and he woke up screaming.

"LOGAN! YOU ARE SO DEAD!" I ran away and went down the swirly slide and he followed. He caught up to me and tackled me to the floor.

"Good morning?" I asked chuckling.

He looked mad, but kissed me on the lips and giggled, "Good morning bitch."

Kendall walked sleepily out of his room and yawned, "What are you two lovebirds doing?"

"Logan threw water on my face to wake me up, so I tackled him." Carlos said smiling as he helped me up.

"Are you sure it was water?" Kendall laughed.

"Ha-Ha Kendall very funny!" I said sticking my tongue out at him.

"Is my boyfriend being a pervert again?" James came out of his room already dressed and pretty-fied. He went up behind Kendall and hugged him.

"Always." Kendall yawned again.

"We should go take a shower." Carlos said to me.

"Didn't you guys take a shower last night before you went to bed?" James questioned smirking.

"Well, maybe, um we want to take another."

"I think they sexed each other up again." I heard Kendall say as Carlos and I entered our room.

"HEY! Kendall I heard that!" I said as Carlos dragged me to the bathroom.

A chorus of laugh could be heard from the kitchen.

…_At Rocque Records_

**James POV**

Gustavo had us singing this new song. I was really liking it, it was very catchy. Kendall smiled as he saw me dancing like a dork to the song.

"Dogs, STOP!" Gustavo said as Kelly showed him some papers and talked quickly. Gustavo face turned worried and angry.

"DIAMOND,KNIGHT! OUT HERE _NOW_!" he yelled into the microphone.

I gulped and exited the recording booth with Kendall. Kendall grabbed my hand, and I looked up at him and he smiled. "Calm down Jamie, I'm right here."

I returned his smile and we walked up to Gustavo. He led us to his office and when we reached our destination, he sighed.

"What is this?" he asked throwing a bunch of pictures on his desk.

Kendall and I sifted through them in shock. They were pictures of Kendall and me kissing in the car.

"Dammit, dammit, dammit!" I yelled.

"Yeah, dammit is right James!" Gustavo yelled. He was turning red.

"Well, we were actually hoping that we could come out to everyone, but not like this!" Kendall said sadly.

"Do you know how much I'm going to have to pay, so that they don't put these pictures out in the open!" Gustavo yelled.

"Then don't pay. It's not like you fucking care enough to." Kendall threw the pictures back on the desk and dragged me with him out of the office.

"Kendall! Wait!" Gustavo was calmer now."I will take care of this. I owe you dogs a lot."

"Thank you Gustavo." Kendall said as a smile appeared on his face. He then went up to Gustavo and hugged him.

"You're welcome. Okay, okay! TOO MUCH LOVE!"

"Sorry."Kendall laughed.

"Thanks so much Gustavo." I said smiling.

"Yeah, yeah dogs. Don't let this happen again. Ok?"

"We promise." Kendall said smiling. We went back to the recording booth where Carlos and Logan were having a thumb war.

"YES! I WIN!" Carlos shouted triumphantly.

"I let you win." Logan said giggling.

We continued to sing the new song, and finally after a few hours of singing and learning new dance moves, we were sent home.

We were sitting in the limo when I leaned over to Kendall and whispered in his ear, "Do you really think Gustavo will be able to take care of it?"

"Of course, why wouldn't he?"

"I don't know, I-I'm just worried."

Kendall grabbed my chin with one hand and turned my face toward his. "Baby. Everything will be fine." He kissed me lightly on the lips. "I promise."

"Okay. I just worry too much." I smiled slightly.

"I know." He chuckled.

**Carlos POV**

Kendall and James didn't bother to tell us what was going on. But I was too nervous to care, I was too nervous about my surprise date with Logan tonight. I hoped everything would go swimmingly. When did I start using words like swimmingly? I spend way too much time with Logan. Not that that's a bad thing.

Logan noted that I was nervous about something. He leaned towards me and put his arm around my shoulders.

"Everything okay baby?"

"Oh! Yeah, I'm cool." I smiled.

"You seem fidgety, you wanna tell me what's up?"

"Logan. I'm fine. By the way, um remember we have to go somewhere later. Just you and me."

"Oh, yeah. Do we have to dress up?"

"A little. Not too fancy but not too casual."

I had lied to Logan and told him that Gustavo wanted us to go to this place for interview, when in actuality I was going to take him to this nice restaurant for a date that he would hopefully never forget.

When we reached the apartment it was about 5:30. I had told Logan to be ready by 6:15 because I reservation at the restaurant for 6:45. I hopped into the shower, combed my hair nicely and went to see what Mama Knight had bought me to wear on the date.

It was pretty fashionable. (lol) It was a gray cardigan with a white button up shirt with a dark black tie and some dark skinny jeans.

James walked into my room when I was done getting dressed. He knew about my date with Logan.

"Looking good man! Except for one thing!"

"What James? My hair?" I laughed mockingly.

"Yes." He said seriously.

"Oh my goodness."

"Come here let me fix it."

He dragged me the bathroom and styled my hair with a little faux hawk.

"There. Now you don't look like you're going to visit your grandma."

"Hey! What was wrong with my little swoop?"

"Too grandma-ish"

I laughed. "Whatever, thanks James."

I exited the room to find Logan standing there looking heavenly.

"Oh hot damn!" I said without even realizing it. He was wearing a white shirt with a gray scarf and a nice black jacket.

He blushed, "You like it?"

"Yeah! You look great! Let's go!" We started to exit the apartment when I remembered something.

"Wait, just a second Logie, I almost forgot something." I ran to my room and retrieved a little burgundy box. I shoved it in my pocket and went back to join Logan.

"What did you forget?"

"Oh, uh my phone." I lied.

We made our way to the Big Time Rush mobile, and I drove us to the restaurant.

"Hey Carlos, where are we going? I thought we were supposed to go to Rocque Records."

"I'm kidnapping you." I joked.

He looked at me confused and I smiled. "I'm kidding Logie! It's a surprise though."

"Is this the secret that you were hiding with Mama Knight?" he smirked.

"Maybe."

We finally reached our destination and Logan's face was in awe.

I went over to his side of the car and opened the door and held my hand out to him. He got out of the car and smiled.

"Wow. I j-just. I don't know what to say. You're amazing Carlos. How could you afford this?"

"I've been saving up." I smiled. I had taken up sign spinning as a side job and I was really good at it, so I would get bonuses. I had saved up enough for the date.

We walked into the restaurant and there was a snobby girl in the front. Her face lit up when she saw Logan and I. Guess that's what happened when you look good!

"How may I help you gentlemen?" she winked at Logan.

"I have reservations for a private booth. It should be under Carlos Garcia."

She typed something into the computer and smiled at me. "Right this way." She started walking towards the back of the restaurant. The booth was beautiful and private.

"Have a nice dinner." This time she winked at me and slipped me her number with the menus. I crumpled it up and threw it at her back as she walked away. She didn't notice.

Logan laughed at me.

"Silly girls these days." I smiled at Logan and reached across the table and held his hands.

The waitress came in and smiled at me.

"Hey Carlos! How've you been? And who's this handsome fellow?"

"I'm great! And this is Logan. Logan, this is Stephanie. She's an old family friend."

Logan smiled and extended his hand to greet her.

"Well, Carlos I could see you've done well."

I smiled and giggled and Logan blushed.

"Now what can I get for you to drink?"

I looked at Logan so that he would order first.

"Um I'll have lemonade please."

"Alright sweetie, and for you Carlos."

"Diet coke por favor."

"Alright, I'll give you boys a few minutes to look over the menu and I'll be back with your drinks."

**Logan POV**

I don't know why, but I kinda got a little jealous of that stupid Stephanie girl. I mean, did you see the way she was looking at him! She was too nice to him! Well whatever, he didn't seem interested in her.

"Logie, what's wrong?"

I didn't realize that I was spacing out. I plastered a fake smile on my face. "Oh, nothing Carlos."

"I know something's wrong. And if it's about Stephanie, don't worry boo, she's just some girl that my family knows. I love you and you only."

"Can you like read minds or something?" This time I actually did smile. "Love you too."

I was having a great time with Carlos. When we were eating the waitress came back and asked if we needed anything else.

"Yeah, since we're under age we can't have alcohol…unless..."

"No Carlos."

"Damn, okay then can we please have some apple cider?"

"Of course, I'll be right out with that."

She left and came back within a few minutes with two glasses and a bottle of apple cider.

"Thank you."

"Enjoy."

We were both sipping our apple cider when Carlos spoke up.

"Logan, can I ask you something?"

"Yeah, anything baby. What is it?"

That's when he went and sat down next to and pull out a little burgundy box. "Logan Mitchell, I promise that I will love you forever, can you promise me too?"

I was in heaven with this boy. There was no doubt in my mind that I was completely and irrevocably in love with Carlos Garcia.

I was in shock. Happy shock. "YES! CARLOS I LOVE YOU!" He slipped the ring onto my finger and I embraced him tightly and kissed him all over his face. When we finally pulled apart he was smiling goofily.

"You can never go back on a promise ring Logie, this is your last chance." He joked.

"I would never want to Carlos." I smiled. "Since we started dating my life is a trillion times better. It's more exciting and fun and amazing. All because of you. And I would never want it to be any other way."

He kissed me and when he pulled back I saw that his lip was quivering. Then the tears came. "You are soo sweet to say that Logie. I love you. "

This had to be one of the most amazing moments of my life. I had found a love so true and amazing. I don't know what could've made me happier.

**Narrator POV**

Hmmm, can they all really be so happy? I don't know. Did Carlos and Logan see the picture snapped of them by the paparazzi? Is Gustavo going to actually pay for the pictures not to be out in public? Who knows. Oh wait yeah the person typing this…. :O

**A/N: Ah! Okay so I had to throw in all that lovey dovey stuff about Carlos and Logan because I just LOVE IT! Okay to explain a few things… Carlos gave Logan a promise ring, not an engagement ring. Also he had a private booth and had a waitress that he knew because they didn't want the paparazzi to see them out on a date or anything like that! **** So, I don't think this is one of my best chapters but I hope you still liked it! Oh yeah! And my little sister, ****..henderson, wrote a Halloween story about Big Time Rush, so go check it out and review it! Also please don't forget to …..**

_**REVIEW!**_

**Carlos:** Is it hot in here, or is it just you?

**Logan:** Uh, no, it is hot in here. I was just making pizza bagels.

…what I didn't change the quote… :)

**OH I ALMOST FORGOT!**

**If you want to see Carlos and Logan's outfits for their date, look at my profile! :D**


	19. The End

**A/N: This is the last chapter! AH! And it's sad so…beware.**

**Logan POV**

I woke up the next morning in Carlos' bed, with no clothes on. I blushed, remembering what we had done the night before. I searched around for my boxers, but had no luck in finding them.

"Damn, where did I throw them?" I finally found them…but Carlos was wearing them. I laughed, might as well wear his then. I found his 10 feet away from the bed and put them on. Then I slipped into some pajama pants and made my way to the kitchen. James was reading the latest gossip magazine, I rolled my eyes. Gossip annoyed me, it was never true!

James was staring intently at a page in the magazine with a shocked look on his face.

"James? What's wrong?"

"K-Kendall…me…kiss."

I furrowed my eyebrows, confused. "Yeah, you and Kendall always kiss…so what?" He shoved the magazine in my face and I read the headline:

"_Kendall Knight and James Diamond Smooching It Up!"_

_A picture of Big Time Rush boys, James Diamond and Kendall Knight, kissing has surfaced. It appears that the boys were getting close in a car last Friday. Witnesses say, "The boys started to lean in and the next thing you know, they were making out and grabbing on each other." Doesn't seem like these boy are just friends._

James crinkled the magazine up and threw it on the floor.

"LIES! We did not start to make out or grab on each other! What are we going to do!" James started pacing.

"How did this happen! You guys know you are not supposed to kiss in public!"

"Well, we just had a little kiss in the car! And the windows are tinted so I didn't think anyone would see us! Besides! Gustavo said he would take care of this! Oh shit, I'm just…so pissed and stressed right now!"

This could ruin Big Time Rush, I felt so bad for James. I know he felt guilty, but he shouldn't. If Big Time Rush had to split up because of this, it was no one's fault but the damn paparazzi.

"James don't stress. I will fix this. Ever heard of Photoshop?"

"Yeah,so?"

"Well, we could say that that picture was photoshopped! I mean the paparazzi always photoshops pictures!"

I went over to the computer to see if the picture of Kendall and James was already online. What I found pissed me off to no end.

**Carlos POV**

I woke up to screaming. It sounded like Logan. I quickly jumped out of bed and grabbed my helmet. Then I proceeded to the kitchen to see what all the commotion was about.

"What happened!" I asked as I saw James and Logan staring at the computer screen in horror. Logan simply pointed to the screen. There, on the computer screen, was a picture of not only Kendall and James kissing, but pictures of my date with Logan and pictures of us kissing. The title of the article read, "Big Time Gay Love?"

My eyes watered. That date was supposed to be special. Just for Logan and I to remember, and the damn paparazzi just had to spread it all over the internet for everyone to mock.

I opened my mouth to say something but I couldn't say anything. Logan saw the tears in my eyes.

"Oh Carlos, don't cry baby!" he hugged me tightly and rubbed my back.

"Why…Why would t-they d-do that Logan?"

"They are heartless Carlos. Don't cry, I'm right here."

Just then we heard Kendall walk out of his room. "What's wrong you guys?"

James pulled his boyfriend over to the computer and pointed. Kendall groaned and ran a hand through his hair, "B-but Gustavo…"

"Gustavo nothing. Gustavo's a big fat prick who lies! Did you actually think he cared about us Kendall? All he cares about is the success of the band!" James started pacing.

"This is gonna fuck up the band!" Kendall yelled. "I don't think I could do this you guys, I mean…I didn't want to come out like this!"

"W-what's gonna happen to us?" I asked while wiping some tears that had escaped my eyes.

The door to the apartment opened and Mama Knight came in with an angry expression on her face and grocery bags. She dropped the bags and pulled us into a group hug. "I saw…at the market."

We all started to cry. It was just too much to handle. I felt naked, exposed. How would people react? Would the fans care?

"You guys go get ready, I going to rehearsal with you today to talk to that fat lump Gustavo!" Mama Knight said as she pulled away from the group hug and put her hands on her hips.

"Mom, it's okay. We need to take care of this. I don't want you to have to get involved in this crap."

"Kendall honey, I—"

"Mom. I got this." Kendall kissed her on the head.

**Kendall POV**

When the limo pulled up to Rocque Records I was fuming. Dozens of paparazzi were waiting. Hoping to get some dirt on us. Those sick bastards. I wanted to punch them all. But there was one fat bastard that I wanted to hit the most. Gustavo.

Freight Train and two other security guards came out of Rocque Records and escorted us inside.

"KENDALL IS IT TRUE!"

"LOGAN DO YOU HAVE LATIN FEVER!"

"I KNEW IT JAMES!"

"CARLOS HOW IS LOGAN IN BED!"

The paparazzi shouted these obscenities at us as we were guided into the studio. One shoved a recorder in my face and screamed, "HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE GAY!"

"Fuck off!" I yelled as the shoved the recorder out of my face. Freight Train grabbed me and forced me inside the building before anyone else could bug us.

We were greeted by Gustavo. "Dogs, don't you just love all the attention we—"

I punched him straight in the face, "THIS IS YOUR FAULT YOU FAT BASTARD!"

"KENDALL!" Kelly screamed.

Freight Train held me back and whispered "Take it easy Kendall."

I struggled to break free of Freight Train, but had no luck.

"He ruined my life!" I screamed as tears rolled down my cheeks.

Gustavo got back up and his nose was bleeding. "You ungrateful little bitch! I made you famous! And this! _This_ is how you repay me!"

"You do not talk to him like that!" James yelled, he was getting mad, it was evident on his face.

"Well, maybe if you faggots weren't tonguing in public, then this would have never happened!" Gustavo said matter of factly.

**James POV**

Those words pissed me off to no end. I punched Gustavo so hard in the jaw, that I heard something crack.

"OWW! MY JAW! OWW! YOU FUCKING BITCH YOU'RE GONNA—"

"EVERYBODY STOP!" We were surprised to see that Freight Train had spoken up. Everyone froze and looked at him. "Kelly, call the hospital for Gustavo. I'm going to get those pesky paparazzi out of here. You boys go to Gustavo's office. We can't let the paparazzi snap anymore photos of you or make up some crazy ass story."

I was pacing around Gustavo's office. "James,_ please_ stop pacing. You're making me nervous!" Carlos said as he wringed his hands.

"S-sorry." I sat down on Gustavo's desk and looked at my hand. It was swelling.

"James…I'm sorry." Kendall spoke up and was looking at me. His usually bright green eyes, were sad and dull.

"Why? You didn't do anything wrong."

Well…your dream is ruined…because of all of this."

"Baby. The only thing that matters to me is you. I don't care about all the fame and fortune. Al long as I have you, I couldn't be happier."

Kendall smiled and a tear rolled down his cheek. "I love you James Diamond."

"I could love no one more than I love you Kendall Knight."

He came over and hugged me and we just stayed like that for a while.

**Logan POV**

I was happy to see that James and Kendall could find happiness in a situation like this. I was sitting on Carlos' lap on Gustavo's chair. Carlos was playing with a loose string on my shirt.

"Baby?"

"Yeah Carlitos?"

"Does this mean…Big Time Rush is over?"

I turned my head and looked at him. He looked worried, "I-I think so…"

He sighed and wrapped his arms around my waist. "Well I still have you." He kissed my back. "And I hope it stays that way forever."

"I hope so too."

**Narrator's POV**

Many years have passed since that big incident with Big Time Rush happened. I bet you want to know what happened. Well, the boys tried to continue with their music but it just didn't work out. The band broke up due to the fact that people couldn't handle a gay boy band. Parents complained and went to stores and boycotted their music. Most of their fans turned against them and everything just went downhill for Big Time Rush.

You're probably wondering, how did they continue with their music if Gustavo and them were now enemies? Well, Griffin had always loved Big Time Rush, so he had tried to help them. It didn't work. Big Time Rush, the band, died a year later.

The boys went back to Minnesota to continue their normal lives. Although, they would still once in a while get dirty glares sent their ways, they were happy with each other. They still had people who would come up to them and ask them for their autographs, or tell them how much of an inspiration they were to them. Life was somewhat better. Logan and Carlos got married at the age of 18 in a beautiful church by the beach. James and Kendall got married on their 5 year anniversary in Hawaii ,actually on the beach.

The boys still got together for Christmas and Thanksgiving, and all the major holidays.

At age 30, James and Kendall adopted a beautiful baby girl and named her Kelly. They loved her like she was their own. One night, Kendall and James decided to go on a date, so Logan and Carlos agreed to babysit for them. They were driving to pick up Kelly when the worst happened.

"Kendall, what time is it?"

"Ten-thirty….five."

"You sound so tired baby, do you want me to drive?"

"Nah, Jamie, I'm *yawn* okay."

"Kendall! WATCH OUT!"

A big pickup truck was speeding toward the car. The man in the car was obviously drunk because he was going the wrong way on the freeway. The truck collided with the front of Kendall's car. The front smashed as if it was a flimsy toothpick. Strangely, it had crushed only the driver's side of the car.

"KENDALL!" Kendall was killed immediately. James franticly touched Kendall's face. He tried to pry him out from the smashed metal, but had no success. "Kendall, baby, can you hear me! Please don't be dead. KENDALL!" James was covered in scratches and was slightly dizzy. His vision began to blur. "Kendall…Ken…" He fell back in his seat, passed out.

That night, Kendall Francis Knight died. James suffered a concussion, but besides that he was fine. Except for the fact that he was heartbroken. He couldn't stand life without Kendall. Kendall was his knight in shining armor.

One night, James went to Carlos and Logan's house with Kelly. He found them having family game night with their two daughters, Chloe and Daisy. His eyes began to water, he would never have this again. He wanted the best for his daughter. He didn't want her to have to see her father sad and depressed all the time, it wouldn't be good for her.

"C-can you guys please watch Kelly?"

"Yeah, sure James. Is something wrong?" Logan asked with concern in his eyes.

"N-no, um I have to go." He kneeled down to his daughter and kissed her on the head. "Daddy loves you Kelly. I always will. Don't you ever forget that."

Kelly wrapped her little arms around James' neck and said, "I wuv you too Daddy!"

James felt tears fall out of his eyes. "Take good care of her you guys."

"Um, don't worry James we will. What time will you pick her up?"

"I'll call you."

Logan and Carlos never got that call. That night James Diamond jumped off of a bridge and committed suicide. He had prescription pills and alcohol in his system when police found him. He also had a note in his pocket. Although it was soaked, it was still legible. This is what it said:

"Carlos and Logan-

I'm sorry that I did it. I just couldn't survive without Kendall. I didn't want my daughter to be around someone like me. I want her to grow up in a good and happy environment. Please take care of her. Tell her you love her, brush her hair, sing her to sleep…because I can't do that for her anymore. I want the best for her, and I believe that you guys can give her the best. Thank you guys. I will always love you guys, my best friends.

Love,

James Diamond

Kelly always knew what her father had done. She had heard the excuses that he had to go because God needed him, but she knew that he had taken his life. Still, she didn't blame him, she loved James and nothing could change her mind about that. She would talk to him at night, in hopes that he could hear her from heaven.

She grew up with Daisy and Chloe, but she would never call Carlos or Logan, "daddy." She knew her real daddy was James. She would call Logan and Carlos her uncles. They felt bad for her, losing her father at such a young age, but by the time she was 20 she still refused to call them "dad."

"Are we making a big deal out of this?" Carlos asked Logan.

"I-I don't know Carlos. Kelly lost her father—"

"Yeah, eighteen years ago Logan. She was only two."

"Well, I don't know Carlos, let's not dwell on it."

"Uncle Carlos, Uncle Logan…?"

"Yes sweetie?" Carlos asked as Kelly entered their bedroom with luggage behind her. "What's with the luggage?"

"I'm going to live with my aunt, Katie…I think I should be with my real family."

Logan's eyes watered and Carlos spoke up, "W-what?"

"I love you guys, but my aunt needs me…"

"Why what happened?" Carlos asked alarmed.

"Mama Knight had a heart attack, and Aunt Katie hasn't been well."

"Well, maybe we could help—"

"No, I'm going." And that was the last time they had seen Kelly.

*30 years later*

**Logan POV**

I stood by the hospital bed looking down at the love of my life. He was hooked up to so many things. It hurt me to see him so vulnerable. He looked up at me through the oxygen mask confused.

"Who are you?" he asked for the fifth time.

I sighed and wiped a tear from my eye, "I'm Logan, your husband." I grabbed his hand but he pulled away.

I let go and sat down on the chair by the bed and cried. Carlos had Alzheimer's. He couldn't remember a thing. Not even his name.

"I promise you I'm gonna be there. I wanna be there, no matter what happens, no matter how tragic." Carlos sang and chuckled.

I jumped up and went to Carlos' side. "What! What did you say Carlos!"

"Logie?" He said. He smiled slightly. "I love you Logie. But, I have to go now. He's calling me."

"What? Who?"

Carlos' eyes closed and the heart monitor flat lined. Nurses rushed in, but it was too late. It was his time to go, and I knew it was better than him suffering. Although I miss him, I know he is in a better place. I will always love and remember my big time crush.

**THE END.**

**A/N: So that's it! I hope you enjoyed this story! It was sooo sad to write this chapter and please don't hate me for it! I hope you liked it! PLEASE….**

_**REVIEW!**_

**Director**: Big Time Rush...all alone. Nobody else! On the tallest building...in the sanseis.

**Carlos**: I'm afraid of heights.

**Logan**: I hate tall buildings.

**Kendall**: Nosebleed!

**James**: I get nauseous when I stand up! _(he stands up, then faints)_

**Gustavo**: NEXT!

_(scene cuts to having another director, this one being a female)_

**Director**: They're in a magical underwater city...without girls.

**Logan**: Can't swim.

**Kendall**: Me neither.

**Carlos**: I'm afraid of sharks! _(hides)_

**James**: I get nauseous just drinking water! _(drinks some out of a cup and faints)_

**Gustavo**: NEXT!


End file.
